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258 27 Life after Dave “I wonder if there was time,” said Ann. “Time for what?” said Ben. “For a happy ending,” said Ann. “The tide came in too soon,” said Ben. —Crockett Johnson, Magic Beach (1959) Ruth never got over the loss of Dave. After the mute shock of bereavement, she struggled to cope, seeking a way forward. Immediately after his death, she knew she could not bear to stay in the house alone. So, Dick and Betty Hahn took her back to Baltimore to stay with them. A few weeks later, they brought her along on a planned holiday to Maine. Feeling a little better, Ruth decided to apply for a fellowship at the MacDowell Colony in Peterborough, New Hampshire. There, she would be able to work among fellow artists, away from the memories evoked by Westport.1 In October 1975,when the MacDowell Colony contacted Ursula Nordstrom for a reference, she must have paused for a moment before responding. Over the years, she and Krauss had had a full measure of dramatic conflicts. Three months earlier, Nordstrom had struggled with her note of condolence about Johnson’s death: Though it “came from the heart,” she thought it likely “the worst ‘sympathy’ note ever written” because she “adored Dave, . . . and didn’t see how he ever stayed married to dear Ruth who used to be able to drive me up the wall.”Yet when MacDowell inquired whether Krauss had “any personality problems of which you may know,”Nordstrom said,“I have always found her a delightful person.” Asked for a “frank assessment” of Krauss’s abilities, Nordstrom said that Ruth “brings to all her work the most important qualities —regard for the child’s individuality, imagination, depth of feeling, sensitivity . She is an artist in the true sense of the word.” Despite their differences, Nordstrom and Krauss respected each other.2 Krauss also sought the company of poets closer to home. In late 1975 or early 1976, she joined Dale Shaw’s Westport Poetry Workshop, which included 259 Life after Dave Peggy Heinrich, Janet Krauss, and children’s authors Freya Littledale and Doris Lund. Once a week, they met at the Unitarian Church and later at the Westport Arts Center. Krauss’s energy and work ethic inspired the other participants . Introducing her poem “If Only” as a new work (even though she wrote the first version in 1959), she explained its composition. She had filled many, many sheets of paper, she said, because doing so stimulated her memory , giving her access to the possibilities of accident and of unconscious associations . Then she threw out most of her drafts.When she was stuck for a word, she would stick a pin through the New York Times, see where it landed, and make fresh combinations of words that suited her. Once a month, Julius Gold kept his delicatessen open late so that Shaw’s group could meet for “Poem and Pickle” readings and discussions. Though Krauss was often reluctant to read her work in public, on one of those evenings she did.As the best-known poet in the group, she entered the deli to a standing ovation; more applause followed her reading of “If Only.” For the next seven years, Krauss remained an active participant in their readings—at Gold’s Deli, at the Westport Arts Center, at libraries, and even in New York on a few occasions.3 In the fall of 1977, Ruth had her first residency at the MacDowell Colony. She enjoyed the experience enough to spend the summer of 1978 at another artists’ colony, Yaddo, in Saratoga Springs, New York. She returned to MacDowell that fall and again in August and September 1979, 1980, 1981, and 1982. During her weeks at MacDowell, Krauss was able to write unimpeded. The colony provided her with a studio, a bedroom, a bathroom, and meals. She ate breakfast and dinner in the main dining room, with the other artists. To avoid midday interruptions, MacDowell’s staff quietly left lunch in a picnic basket on Krauss’s doorstep.4 Back home, Ruth had to learn how to take care of the details of daily life— all of the things that Dave had done for her. As she told a friend who asked how she was coping,“I lose and break things and cut and burn myself.” Dave had also paid the bills, looked after the property, and done all the driving. Shelley Trubowitz took her to buy a small, easily...

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