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18 Crazy Jane Meets a Bear “I’ve been looking for you everywhere,” she says when she finally meets him. She has been chasing the bear, but the bear is smart. He kneels down to brush over his tracks with the soft branch of a fir. He catches a hint of her scent, and is gone. It’s not that he’s afraid of Jane, he just doesn’t want to meet her by himself in the woods. No one knows what she might do, if provoked. She has no fear of bears. She’s always wanted a dance partner taller than herself. Sometimes she carries a bag of berries, a slab of ham, to attract the bear, preferably a grizzly. If she’s going to go to all this trouble, she wants to find a big one. She knows he could rip her apart with those strong hands, knows he could lift and toss her out of his path, but she’s used to the risk. She muses to herself, “Can a girl propose?” She decides not to stand upon etiquette. He is afraid she would embarrass him if he introduced her to his friends. She never did have much fashion sense. “I am divorcing my husband and moving in with a bear,” she announces at a party. Then she plunges her hand into a pot of honey. “Some sweets I reserve for him,” she says, licking her own fingers. ...

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