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38 Elegant If I had to describe myself in one word, I think I’d choose elegant. Lesbian is a word I wear like a silk lining that touches my skin when I move. Dyke is a set of charmed snakes I sometimes wrap around me. I love women naked, like water over sculpted rock, like dunes that shift when I move across them. Sometimes I look in the mirror and see my image reversed: I’m short, with cropped hair, pants worn low on my hips. When I was thirteen I stopped eating the family food: I made my own and ate beside them. Gay was a book I hid under my bed. I slept with my body like a secret lover. Once, I tried to kill her. I thought I could step out and leave her like a dress pooled behind me on the floor. Now, when I look in the mirror, the one thing I can count on is the scar, long and clean and elegant. ...

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