Love, Sorrow, And Rage

7. Odd Women Out

7 Odd Women Out THE MENU FOR the day is hamburgers with fries, and a salad. Sharlea is the head chef. As is her style, Sharlea slowly and deliberately works the meat patties, careful to protect her inch-long fingernails polished, this time, in lavender. Dixie prepares the salad, while I peel and cut up potatoes. "You know my aunts who raised me after my parents died? I don't know if it was the talk we had or what," Dixie says of our recent conversations, "but I sent them a letter. I wrote a letter to my two maiden aunts on my father's side. I haven't seen them in about ten years and I decided to write. I thought maybe they'll get in touch with me, we'll see. I thought, we'll see, I'm not putting my hopes up. If they do, they do. "They did. They got in touch with me. They came to visit me last Tuesday. I was nervous, it had been ten years. "They stayed three and a half hours. They brought me some chocolates and a plaque that says, 'You are Loved.' They said it was for my birthday. They remembered my birthday." Felice Mills peers into the library. She doesn't want to join us. "I'm keeping to myself," she tells us. "Since everyone 127 Copyrighted Material 128 Chapter Seven leaves all the time, I'm not gonna get involved with anybody, and I'm not gonna talk to anybody either." It's been several weeks since Felice's case manager left for vacation. Margery is helping with the potatoes but not doing a very good job. Felice tells her so, and Margery gladly hands her the potato. Felice, peeling feverishly, begins to talk. "I had one child, a daughter. But she's dead, and so is my grandson. They died in a car accident. My daughter was twenty-seven years old and the boy was four. "My husband died in the same crash. It was on the New Jersey Turnpike. My husband, he brought them into the world and then he took them away. "I don't want to have anything more to do with people. I decided then I hate people." Then, in barely her next breath, Felice says, "I like your bracelets. Can I have them?" "I'm sorry," I answer, "these were a gift from my husband . I can't give them away." "Okay," Felice goes on, "But there's a place that sells beautiful Indian bracelets up the street." Switching topics, Felice continues, "Since I'm schizophrenic , when I get angry and upset I tear my own clothes off my body." All this while, Felice is scraping potatoes. Suddenly she stops, drops the potato and peeler on the table. "Every time I cook I start talking about my private business. Every time I start cooking. I'm not going to cook no more." She turns away from the table, picks a book off the library shelf, and announces its title, Odd Woman Out. "This is me," she says, "I'm an odd woman, so I should probably get out" "I don't think you're odd," I say. "I like your company, and I hope you'll stay." "Ha," she snaps back, "you like me because you're odd too, and odd people like odd people." Copyrighted Material Odd Women Out 129 IN THE MONTHS to come, stealing at Woodhouse gets bad and rumor has it that Felice is the main culprit. Some women report seeing her with their possessions. Also, her affair with crack seems to be getting more intense. Staffoffer to help her move into a therapeutic community, ifthat's what she wants. This night it is only a small group for dinner. Nora sweeps the floor under the table where we work, muttering, "This is filthy. I can't cook and I can't eat in a place like this." I agree. I find the dirty stove, greasy counters, and lack ofsupplies in the kitchen area disheartening. One of these days, I think to myself, I'll come in just to do a thorough cleaning. For now, I want to know what people think ofWoodhouse. "This place is blessed, and this place is a blessing," Nora assures me. Denise says the best thing about Woodhouse is it "changed my life from homeless to having a home." "It...