Sex and the University: Celebrity, Controversy, and a Student Journalism Revolution

9. A Student Sexicon: Sexual Slang in College Newspaper Sex Columns

Word fabrication is exactly the kind of power unique to a sex columnist. NADIA STADNYCKI “Come and Get It While the Gettin’s Good,” Temple News, January 19, 2006 The media have long held a prominent position in not only defining and normalizing different facets of sex and courtship, but also in creating and challenging the words used to identify them. Since the start of the sexual reform press in the 1870s, the media have been the principal catalysts behind the expansion of the country’s sexual lexicon, or what Harvard Independent sex columnist Katie Giblin once called the “sexicon” (“The Harvard Sexicon,” Harvard Independent, Apr. 29, 2004). Over the past decade, college newspaper sex columns have coined or publicly solidified the largest amount and most varied set of words, acronyms , and euphemisms relevant to the modern student “sexicon.” This sampling of terms has been culled from more than two thousand columns published since the trend’s start in the late 1990s in more than one hundred student newspapers in the United States and Canada. It is the first known inventory of modern student slang focused on sex and social interaction that cites verified student sources, and builds on book-length collections of general student jargon published in the 1990s and 2000s, including Connie Eble’s College Slang 101 and Pamela Munro’s Slang U.: The Official Dictionary of College Slang. A Student Sexicon Sexual Slang in College Newspaper Sex Columns 175 176 A STUDENT SEXICON After-bad-sex moment (n.): an uncomfortable period between sexual partners following an unpleasant bout of sexual activity. Aka: the mourning after. (Bonnie Sultan, “The Mourning After: Surviving a Lame Shag,” GW Hatchet, Oct. 18, 2004.) After-sex smell (n.): a strong bodily scent accrued through intense sexual activity, comprising what Lumberjack columnist Claire Fuller called “perspiration , semen and vaginal fluids.” (Claire Fuller, “Something to Think About,” Lumberjack, Jan. 29, 2004.) Air Jordan (n.): more commonly known as a queef. As Post columnist Brynn Burton wrote, it is a noise emitted from the vagina during sexual intercourse that is “odorless, spontaneous, virtually undetectable and unpreventable, but it produces a sound so vile, it has the ability to kill a night of serious lovin.’” Aka: coital cacophony, coochie fart, cunt trumpet, hiccup down below, little poonany “pffffffffffff,” vaginal virtuoso, and vart. (Brynn Burton, “Vaginal, Um, Noises Worth Celebrating,” Post, Oct. 17, 2002.) All-American head push (n.): an aggressive downward shove on the head of an individual performing oral sex on a male. Example: “It’s the worst of them all, the devil of bad manners. . . . We [women] know the act, you first rub our neck, next you massage our head, and then all of a sudden you push us down like a plunger in a toilet bowl. As much as you like it, we don’t. As much as you think it will make the experience better, all it will get you is an abrupt stop.” (Brynn Burton, “Maintain Bedroom Manners for Successful Sex,” Post, Feb. 27, 2003.) Angel of the morning (n.): a female completing what was traditionally known as “the walk of the shame.” Aka: that girl. (Bonnie Sultan, “Who’s That Girl?” GW Hatchet, Apr. 4, 2005.) Anti-anals (n.): individuals against engaging in anal sex. As Daily Californian columnist Sari Eitches wrote, “Anti-anals have three objections: it’s dirty, it’ll hurt and it’s gay.” (Sari Eitches, “Entering the Exit Door,” Daily Californian , Sept. 21, 2004.) Anti-Vagina Day (n.): a reformation of Valentine’s Day created by male students angry at women who broke their hearts. As Hoya columnist Julia Baugher quoted undergraduate men exclaiming, “‘Everything that Valentine’s Day stands for, Anti-V Day is against.’ . . . ‘No romantic dinners, no wine, no expensive jewelry!’” (Julia Baugher, “Don’t Diss on Valentine’s Day,” Hoya, Feb. 7, 2003.) SEXUAL SLANG IN THE COLUMNS 177 Approach and avoid (n.): a complicated relationship game in which one partner alternates being extremely intimate and subsequently very standoffish, leaving the other partner confused about where the relationship stands. Aka: mixed-message romance. (See Elspeth Keller, “Saying Goodbye to Chutes and Ladders,” Daily Trojan, Mar. 24, 2006; and Rose Afriyie, “Avoiding Mixed Message Sex,” Pitt News, Sept. 6, 2005.) ARF (n.): alcohol-related flaccidity of the penis during sexual activity. Example: “Boys, consider ARF nature’s way of telling you that your penis, like heavy...