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Appendix A Rosenthal as Humorist Ambiguous truths Once Rosenthal gave a concert in a city in the state of Ohio. Because his concert piano, which always followed him when he was on tour, had not arrived in time, he had to make do with a wretched piano for the night. But after the ¤rst few notes of Liszt’s Don Juan Fantasie the badly screwed-in lyre, on which the pedals were hanging, fell down,and Rosenthal was forced to play the extraordinarily dif¤cult piece without pedals. But when it rains it pours. In the middle of the piece a leg of the chair on which the artist was sitting broke off so that Rosenthal was forced to support the chair with his own leg and ¤nish playing the piece in this condition. Rosenthal told me this story himself, and I commented jokingly: “Dear Rosenthal, I know that you are your own worst critic. How did you rate your play under such conditions?” Quick-witted as usual he answered: “I think I announced somewhat ambiguous truths to the audience like Pythia on her threelegged stool.”1 (Alfred Fischhof, Neues Wiener Journal, March 8, 1925) On an audience member’s snoring On another occasion [Rosenthal] expostulated with a sleepy member of the audience at a concert he was attending, “For pity’s sake, don’t snore so loudly or you will waken up the whole audience.” (Musical America) On Teresa Carreño2 Recently [Rosenthal] was informed that Carreño almost refused to appear in a certain Western city because she had been advertised as the “Female Paderewski.” The quick-witted Moriz replied: “They should have called her the ‘Male Carreño.’” (Leonard Liebling) On a colleague’s besetting sin [Rosenthal] attended a recital given by a colleague whose besetting sin was his abuse of the “loud pedal” by persistently holding it down. When a friend remonstrated with him for arriving somewhat late he replied: “Never mind, I can hear it all still.” On colleague W.’s performance of Rosenthal’s arrangement of Chopin’s “Minute” Waltz Colleague W. [Alexander Winterberger?] put Chopin’s so-called Minute Waltz in my dif¤cult contrapuntal arrangement in thirds on his program. What I had foreseen came to pass: he played the piece in the safe slowest tempo. After the concert he asked me: “So, how did you like your Minute Waltz?” I replied: “Like is not the right word. It was the most beautiful quarter of an hour of my life.” On Ignaz Friedman not applauding him Once, when the impresario George Kugel presented Rosenthal in the big hall of the Musikverein in Vienna, he invited Ignaz Friedman to share his box. During the intermission , Kügel went to the artists’ room to see Rosenthal, and presently a pupil of Rosenthal’s came in and said, “I saw Friedman sitting in Mr. Kügel’s box, and he did not applaud at all.” Rosenthal replied, “No wonder, he has a stiff wrist.” On his greatest pleasure “In what do I take the greatest pleasure?” [Rosenthal] repeated after a reporter put that question to him. “Well, I sometimes think it is in reading critical praise of my piano playing. Then I decide that it is, after all, more from reading severe criticisms of other pianists.” (Musical America) On how to do a good business “One of the managers I had was always trying to ¤nd something sensational by which to attract attention,” [Rosenthal] said the other day, “and long after I had ceased to play under his direction he came to me for advice. He was a pianist himself, although a poor one, and had become an impresario after he had failed as a virtuoso. “‘What can I do,’ he said to me, ‘to make this concert attract the public? I want to do something to get the concert talked about.’ “‘Take the largest hall in Vienna,’ I told him, ‘and charge no admission fee. The hall will be crowded.’ “‘Yes, I know it will,’ he answered, ‘but I will not make any money by that.’ “‘You just do as I tell you,’I urged him. ‘You get the hall packed with people by letting them in free. Then you play the ¤rst number and the last on the program. Let the other artists come in between your selections.’ “‘Yes, but then?’ “‘Then put a notice on the program that everybody leaving the hall after your ¤rst number will have to pay a gulden...

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