Hermeneutics

Employees gathered in the auditorium. They pulled notebooks and pens from briefcases and leather portfolios. Those satisfied with their year-end bonuses partook of the coffee service, which lined the rear wall. Eventually an elephant walked on stage behind a podium and took a giant dump. The size of the dump is not crucial. This prompted some people to help themselves to the pastries, but most just kept watching. One intern hotly fingered the corporate logo embroidered onto her leather folio. The elephant stood not moving and then crashed over and died. Some people stood up; some ran from the room. Some just had that condom broke look about their faces. Everyone looked around for someone to take control of the situation. Some thought the elephant just needed a doctor. Others were certain of its death. My father stood up and addressed the crowd: No. This recently happened at Hermeneutics Corporation. Sure, it’s shocking, but this was the expected outcome. Everyone will be fine. Just fine.