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30 The Conundrum of My Life I died long before I knew my name Long before I muttered my first syllable Long before I lost my first tooth Long before I was submerged in the Holy books Long before I shed my first blood Long before I lost my innocence So, don’t ask me why I am not myself I was indoctrinated to despise my tongue I was indoctrinated to hate my ebony skin I was indoctrinated to be ashamed of my short hair I was indoctrinated to loathe my unschooled mother I was indoctrinated to abhor my flesh and blood Thus, I fell into the chasms of knowledge And like a bat in a daylight flight Fell into the pure and unadulterated Faith of the West Fell head over heels in love with my modern education Fell prey to the tight-jean mentality of my youth Fell into the mini-skirt traps of my adolescent life Fell into the romantic love traps of the West Never having learned a thing of substance of my culture Therefore, don’t cry for me For your tears will be wasted A dead woman is not worth a tear A dead existence is nothing to fret over I died long before I knew my name Long before I produced an heir Long before I was put six feet under For there, in the depth of earth, I shall forever remain Unknown Unacknowledged! ...

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