I Spit on their Graves: Testimony Relevant to the Democratization Struggle in Cameroon

Newsy Tit-bits

191 Newsy Tit-bits T he death of President-for–life, Felix Houphouet Boigny of Côte d’Ivoire was announced on Tuesday, 7th December 1993. Did I get the name right? Any secondary school chap who can correctly pronounce and write that name at first attempt certainly has a bright future. The old man without a medal died at the official age of 88 after 33 continuous years in power as a (benevolent?) dictator. Everybody, however, knows that he died a centenarian (or is it centurion?). Nobody, however, knows exactly when he died. It is evident that he continued ruling at least for several days after dying. The death was only announced when it became quite clear that he could no longer continue with his post mortem rule. That is power for you in its African version. Another African President-for-life who will surely die in office is His Excellency Kamuzu Banda of Malawi. His age is officially put at 90, which means that he clocked 100 several decades ago. He recently underwent a very delicate brain surgery in South Africa but rushed back to Malawi to recuperate and convalesce on his divine throne. Resolutely set on the same road as Boigny and Banda are their following comrades-in-absolute-dictatorial power: Eyadema of Togo, Biya of Cameroon, Mobutu of Zaire, Moi of Kenya and Bongo of Gabon. These are the “Does of Africa” about whom we have talked before in this column. The last mentioned in the series only recently organized his own masquerade under the euphemism “democratic presidential elections.” 192 Godfrey B. Tangwa (Rotcod Gobata) Yaounde is still breathing. Under kilotons of garbage (while the rest of the country bleeds?). And now, JeanBaptiste Bokam, our own Hon. Minister, of…I forget! (With over 50 ministers, is it really humanly possible to remember all their names and pseudo portfolios?). Bokam is out with a powerful delegation to Senegal, Côte d’Ivoire and Benin to study how those wretched countries manage to dispose of their garbage. Don’t laugh. I am not the one saying it. I heard it over the Radio. So these fellows are boldly admitting that they don’t even know how to dispose of garbage. So what the hell are they doing sitting tight on jobs they can’t do when thousands of capable Cameroonians are both willing and ready to do them? In “KEEPING YAOUNDE CLEAN” (CAMPOST, August 14-21, 1992) did the son of Gobata not ask these fellows to get the hell out of here so that more sensible and sensitive Cameroonians could start salvaging this country from their mess? But these are people who fear neither God nor man and who have a sense of neither shame nor embarrassment. Have you seen the results of the latest opinion polls? Check them out in “Challenge Mensuel,” of December 1993. John Fru Ndi is riding the crest of popularity among all sectors of society and all professions in all the provinces of our national territory. Paul Biya is uniformly right at the bottom of the popularity ratings. Even Kontchou Koumengni, whose logorrhoea or verbal dysentery cannot endear him to many Cameroonians, is several shades better on the opinion ratings than his master. But do you think that means anything to him? Have you heard him even cough since the strike of the civil servants brought the whole country to a virtual stand-still? He is calmly and quietly sipping his Chivas in Mvomeka’a. How else can a leader demonstrate utter contempt for the people he is leading? Come to think of it, the man is really a “L’homme Courage.” He has guts! 193 I Spit on their Graves: Testimony Relevant to the Democratization Struggle In a recent Cabinet meeting of the New Deal’s War Council, including all those Ministers, both prime and ordinary, who do Professor Biya’s dirty jobs for him, they frankly admitted to themselves that the present nation-wide indefinite strike is the greatest challenge they are facing ever since they stole the people’s victory over dictatorship in 1992. They noted that the strike is completely effective in all the Provinces except the East and South Provinces which, partly because of their remoteness, have not yet heard about the strike. I saw them sitting there with their heads half bowed like he-goats awaiting buyers in Ndu market. Some were furiously taking...