The Crabs of Bangui

Chapter Twenty Four

163 Chapter Twenty Four One of the very first things to cross her mind as she sat silent was the Encounter Anthem which Hansel memorized the very day they left Futru and which he recited every morning before they said their morning prayer: THERE’S A NEW WORLD SOMEWHERE THERE’S A NEW WORLD SOMEWHERE THEY CALL THE PROMISED LAND AND I’LL BE THERE SOMEDAY IF YOU WILL HOLD MY HAND, I STILL NEED YOU THERE BESIDE ME NO MATTER WHAT I DO, FOR I KNOW I’LL NEVER FIND ANOTHER YOU. THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE FOR EACH OF US THEY SAY, AND YOU’LL BE MY SOMEONE FOREVER AND A DAY, I COULD SEARCH THE WHOLE WORLD OVER UNTIL MY LIFE IS THROUGH; ANDIKNOWIWILLNEVERFINDANOTHERYOU. IT’S A LONG, LONG JOURNEY, SO STAY BY MY SIDE. IF I WALK THROUGH A STORM YOU’LL BE MY GUIDE, BE MY GUIDE. IF THEY GAVE US A FORTUNE MY TREASURE WOULD BE SMALL, I COULD LOSE IT ALL TOMORROW AND NEVER MIND AT ALL; 164 Linus T. Asong BUT IF I SHOULD LOSE YOUR LOVE, DEAR, I DON’T KNOW WHAT I’D DO FOR I KNOW I’LL NEVER FIND ANOTHER YOU. She had concluded that her husband believed in every word he recited and sang, and loved him all the more for that. But now, she had discovered that it was all deceit, and that the words did not touch his heart. She recalled the motto on the door of the priest who received participants for confession – Speak the truth and speak it ever, for, he who hides the wrong he does, does the wrong thing still – and wondered if he read it at all when he went in for confession. She recalled what they were told on the first day regarding the confessions: “As we enter this new beginning of our lives, dear brothers and sisters, we must learn to forgive. In our Lord’s prayer, Jesus tells his disciples to ask God to ‘forgive us our trespasses as we forgive them that trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil.’ You will confess all your sins, and the priest, God’s anointed, and who will never betray your secret, will intercede for God almighty to forgive you.” The very next day, and unable to contain her disappointment, Marion returned to Futru to talk to the priest who received them for confession. “Father”, she said after telling him that her marital life was falling apart, “did my husband tell you at confession that thee was another woman in his life?” The priest was surprised at the question because the amount of money Hansel donated was still the talk of the parish. Even if a man who had done so much for the organisation was at fault, he would not add insult to injury. Luckily, Hansel had said nothing of the sort. The priest told her: 165 The Crabs of Bangui “Madam, although it is against the canons of the church for a priest to reveal to a second party what the other said at the confessional, I must say very honestly that your husband said no such thing.” There was silence and then he went on: “If he did, and given his status and what his single attendance means to our organisation, I would have told either of two things. I would have told him to come and confess to you and beg for forgiveness or I would have asked him to go back to that girl and cancel the relationship, for good. After all, there is no sin too big to forgiven, if only you truly repent.” Marion shook her head sadly and said: Father, what my husband has done to me is more than a sin. He has shattered my whole life. It is the sin of sins.” The man of God found himself helpless before this mighty challenge. All he could do was to reiterate what Marion had heard before on that blessed (or was it cursed!) day at Futru on their first night: There is no sin too big to be forgiven, if only you truly repent. And then he went on to ask her: “Madam, have you spoken to him about it?” And even before she had time reply the priest added: “What did he say? Did he not ask for forgiveness?” “I haven’t...