The Art of Being Alone: Poems 1952–2009

To a Woman

146 To a Woman 女に (1991) Before We Were Born When you were not yet on this earth I was not here either, but we, together, sensed the scent of the air as lightning dashed across the cloudy sky and we knew that someday there would be a day when we would meet on an ordinary street corner in this world Birth That time, too, winds crossed over trees Loan sharks were counting bills, licking fingertips A walrus roared in a zoo Back then, too, the world was a mysterious entity when you, twisting, moved forward toward light down the dark birth canal, smelling of blood A Fist What was it? What was it that you were clasping tight inside your tiny tiny fist, the thing you were determined not to lose? You throw it at me straight at me, even now To a Woman 147 Blood When you bled for the first time in your fight with the starry sky I learned to sow seeds in the barren field of time Thus we launched the first step of our long journey toward making peace with death Day after Day We lived separate tales in separate families in mornings when raindrops reach ears, in afternoons when winds rattle windows not knowing they would merge into one I slept the nights when you did not sleep, but your days I did not share were trimmed with the glowing clouds I saw in sunsets To Meet At the beginning there was a copy of a picture book and a faded photo then one day two large eyes and a brusque hello then words you penned in a free and easy hand I grew to meet you little by little before I touched your hand I touched your soul 148 Lost If I get lost you hold my hand to lead me if you get lost I will also throw away my maps if I behave affected you will laugh it away if you lose your reading glasses I will let you use mine and I will close my eyes and let my head rest on your lap Telephone When you fall silent time stiffens mixed in with the sound of your breathing I hear someone else’s laughter in the distance I am adrift, with a telephone line as my lifeline If you hang up. . . . I have no way of getting back to anywhere Snakes You swallow my tail I lunge to bite at your tail We are two snakes forming a ring, unable to move not knowing what is locked up inside our ring Tomb We climbed the slope drenched with sweat The smell of grass choked us There sat the graceless rock We sat on the rock and looked over the sea 女に • 1991 To a Woman 149 In no time we will make love crowned by the rock with our bodies of dirt, with our eyes of mud, with our tongues of water We Laugh We laugh we laugh with the mercilessness of the aged we laugh, on our bellies, peeling lychees we laugh, though frowning from back pain we laugh at the ordinary. We laugh at the extraordinary we laugh with our toothless mouths A Dream Two golden babies drop golden poop under the blue sky we are in the picture you are drawing holding each other’s hand tight we toddle toward where time becomes powerless DEATH I HAVE BECOME FIRE AS I BURN I LOOK AT YOU HARD MY BONES, WHITE AND LIGHT, WILL DISSOLVE ON YOUR TONGUE LIKE AN OPIATE 150 Afterlife Tangled with each other like two endless melodies we frolic with the vacuous sky diaries we kept on a whim, the bed where we slept side by side ruins and barren fields we visited, matching pairs of worn-out shoes we entertain fond memories of the little things we leave behind on earth™ 女に • 1991 ...