New Border Voices: An Anthology

Where Are You, Home?

Where Are You, Home? BRENDA NETTLES RIOJAS Where are you—buried in a past across a river with two names—El Río Grande, El Río Bravo, a river that swallowed family? Where are you—lost between two sides, between two languages? In a mother, whose tongue I tried to hide? In a father, whose skin I tried to emphasize? Where are you—at the edges of an ocean, the Gulf that leads to other lands, in the palm trees that need trimming, in truths buried in sands? Where are you—in the mesquites I climbed as a child, in the tree house made without nails, wood planks balanced on branches teased by Kukulcan? Where are you—in the echoes of Aztec and Mayan chants and sacrifices, in winds from continents divided that caress my thoughts and whisper their direction? To which tribe do I belong? Where are you—in the cord once connected to offspring, in the breasts that nursed them, in the stars surrounding Nuestra Virgencita Morena, our faith mother, our guide? ♦ ♦ ♦ 248 ♦ Brenda Nettles Riojas Where are you—in a state once independent, once Mexican, down in the tip of the Rio Grande, Aztlán, the lost region, home? Why am I still searching when Texas, they say, is home? ...