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Azi Torres swept her arm through the air, pointing at a row of vases filled with congratulatory flowers and a clear plastic bag of free sample products from Grady. "Look at all my stuff," she said, in postpartum. She wore a white hospital gown and green foam-rubber slippers. She had had her baby, a boy, two days before. He slept in a wheeled crib next to her bed. She named him Robert. She sat on the edge of the bed and said, "That's a strong name. It's quick and easy to pronounce, here and in Brazil. It is also Jeff's middle name, but I no pick it because of that." The night before the delivery, she said, she thought it was time, but she was not sure. "I start to feel the pain, strange pain, and stuff. Pain. It comes and goes. I read so much about what is like pain, come and go, come and go. Then I said, This is look like the baby is want to come.' But I thought it was very soft pain/ it was not hard. But then it getting hard and quick, little space between, and I start to get crazy. I was crying and I said probably can be false, and I did try relaxing, do exercise, breathe, things like that. Then I try sleep and I could not sleep and it was whole night like that. Then six-thirty in the morning I start to feel more and more. I called Jeff and he finally get here at nine. I almost died waiting for him. I was feeling the big pain, and I said I go to hospital and it will be false alarm. Then I went to the bathroom. I see something that look like that what they said about—pink. My water didn't, was not broken. Jeff get here and I get to hospital I was two cili—, centimeters.I was scared because I said gosh, I will die if I feel something more than this. The pain was getting strong and the space between the pain was very short and the stro-o-o-ong and short, and stro-o-o-ong and short, Grady Baby 56 Grady Baby and then in one hour they check and everything, and I was really, really in pain. I start to bite my hand and screaming. Screaming loud, like crazy. I was shamed of myself I screamed so much. Jeff started to get crazy too because he never saw me screaming like that. I hit him because he was hold my hand. I hit him a lot because they start put something to help me breathe, the oxygen mask. I told them before that I wanted epi-, epirudal. The doctor broke my water when Iwas six centiments, centimeters . And then another doctor, she was supposed to give me the epidural right away, but was busy with somebody else that was deliver time. After they broke the water the pain get worse because, um, the baby, I don't know, the baby's totally there, you know, and ah, gosh, was hell. Probably hell is better than this pain. Jesus Christ and everything like that. I think I get more pain than everybody because, no because I am, I am not different. Everybody can have the same pain, if broke the water and the doctor is not there to give the epidutoral, and I was not prepared. I did not have the dilation. That's why they cut me, to help me, but the pain was so strong that even with the epidural I felt whole pain in the world, and I am very strong to pain. I am not like—" in a high voice, mocking someone exaggerating her pain, "'aaah,' a little bit like some people that just 'aaah.' I am strong. I bit my hand a lot. My hand the next day was bruised. And I hit Jeff a lot. I think that helped me a little bit because I didn't know what to do with the pain and I did that and, 'Oh shit,' with the arm of the bed, I kill—I don't know how to describe this pain. I don't know how some women have another baby. So painful." She whispered, "Jesus Christ." She smiled a phony syrupy smile and said, "I didn't have 'oooooh' emotional experience I hear about. I was exhausted. I didn't feel nothing...

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