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14. Enter Chad . . . and Tyler
- Gallaudet University Press
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CHAPTER FOURTEEN Enter Chad. and Tyler ~ • • Throughout Alandra's childhood, I always told her that she couldn't marry until she was twenty-five. When she was very young I told her it was against the law for a person to get married younger than that, and it was always a joke between us. When Alandra was twenty-four she asked if she could bring home a man for us to meet. It appeared as though she wanted both Tom and me to approve. By this time, Tom and Alandra had reached another of what Tom describes as "a plateau in their relationship ." Tom says, "We climb awhile, then we level off, then we climb some more." When looking at it from the outside, I have to agree that is the way their relationship seems to progress. Alandra had been dating a guy named Chris Spalding for a couple of years, and he played in the local deaf softball league. They were talking about getting married, but Chris made the mistake of introducing Alandra to his friend Chad, who also played on the league. Chad did all he could to gain Alandra's attention during the next few months, sending her love letters, flowers, and poetry. It's a good thing she had taken that English class that covered poetry! I23 Enter Chad . .. and Tyler Alandra eventually broke up with Chris and fell head over heels in love with Chad. It even ended up well for Chris; a few years later, he married Alandra's best friend, Carol Wilson. The two couples often visit in one another's homes and nobody harbors old jealousies or resentments. While this may seem strange to people outside the Deaf community, a circle of deaf friends may be spread across the country and still remain a very tight group. When they meet a new person at a Deaf gathering, half the fun is trying to discover shared friends or connections through their residential schools. Even when there has been little contact over the years, deaf friendships usually endure both time and distance. Chad Bishop lived in Richardson, Texas, with his parents and younger sister (who were all hearing). We liked him right away-he was just one of those Jamiry-feeling guys, clean cut and nice, exactly the kind of guy you want your daughter to bring home. He immediately fit right in. Chad has sandy blonde hair, hazel eyes, and a disarming smile. He is younger than Alandra by a full five years, but you would never have known it from his behavior-he had enough self-confidence for both of them. He came from a working family and had definitely been taught the value of a dollar. A real jock, he loved all sports, but especially baseball . He joked with me and talked sports with Tom, using a combination of voice and sign. I was surprised to learn that his speech was so impressive not because he had any residual hearing, but because his parents had insisted on speech classes. We could tell he had a good head on his shoulders. Chad seemed comfortable, as though he was not on display . His good humor and intelligence impressed me, but I I24 [18.208.172.3] Project MUSE (2024-03-29 03:17 GMT) Enter Chad . .. and Tyler fell in love with his smile. He was just what I would have wanted my boys to be if they had lived, and he quickly became like my own son. Tom and I felt confident about putting our only child's happiness in his hands. Alandra and Chad dated through the summer and moved in together in the fall. But it wasn't until Alandra said it was time for the parents to meet that I started to realize that this was pretty senous. Getting ready to meet Chad's family was no small task; we wanted everything to go just right. It seemed so important to Chad and Alandra that their parents get along, and I shared that sentiment. The day that Chad's family came for dinner, Tom cooked while I cleaned and kept an eye out for the ferrets. About a year before, I had become enamoured with ferrets. I know they stink, but their mischievous antics make me laugh. I had two females, Peggy and Bella. During my chores I searched for the ferrets so I could lock them in their cage during the visit. Peggy was pretty laid back for...