Chaos and All That: An Irreverent Novel

Chapter 6

8 2 One year one of our friends who had nothing better to do took a trip to Hanyao. There she met a monk who advised her, “You should try to be like the good wife Wang Baochuan.” She jokingly brought this advice back to Peking, where she assembled all the information she could lay her hands on about Wang Baochuan. She also set up a Committee to Write New Works on Wang Baochuan, to see how many people there were who could emulate the good wife of history. She selected that part of the opera libretto where Baochuan has waited eighteen years for her husband Ping, who was forced by his enemies into military service far from home. The participants were required to write versions based on their own lives, using as much of the original text as possible. Inability to use the original would be taken as evidence that the writer’s life had strayed from the orthodox and didn’t match up to Wang Baochuan’s. Those present would all check to see who had been able to use the most of the original text, and that person would be awarded the grand prize – a dog’s head sculpted in clay. The original text read as follows: O’er mountain ranges green with tender grass Spring wind caresses tips of willow fronds, The rising sun spreads bounty on the East And darkling clouds are banished from the skies. 5 To Wujia slopes I walked to gather herbs, 8 3 Before me stood a knight with searching eyes Who bowed, and “Madam,” asked with smiling mien “Does Wang Baochuan still live at Southern Cave?” He gazed with eyes that saw me as I am, 10 Shamed by his scrutiny, my face blushed deep. How like my Ping! But this an officer Three strands of beard aflutter on his breast. We talked awhile, ’twas Ping my love indeed Returned to seek Baochuan in her cold cave. 15 Husband and wife smiled joyful through their tears, My basket in his hand, he led me home. No happy auspice warned me of this hour, He came before my eyes had pricked with tears Ere magpie called, or lantern flower bloomed. 20 I am a shoot long parched by drought and cold Brought back to life by sweet, refreshing rain. My cave was derelict, my bed like ice, Now springtime sunlight drives the cold away. Once heaven pressed me down, and earth confined, 25 Now heav’n is high, and earth is mine to roam. Long years apart, together once again, We talked of times gone by, confirmed our love ’Til lamp oil all was spent and moon had gone, The fifth watch sounding told us day had dawned. He told of 30 Injustice borne through eighteen bitter years, His loss of status, long and cruel campaigns. But now, as knight and nobleman enfeoffed, Our sov’reign orders his return to court. Making me Joyful one instant, furious the next, 35 Fraught now with anxious fears, now laughing free, Emotions mixed, conflicting, hard to bear. Commander Mu dealt graciously with Ping, The monster Wei’s cruel treatment rankles still, That grace and venom both will be repaid, 8 4 40 This day my Ping reports them to the throne. Now flowers bloom again, our smiles return, For eighteen years we languished in the cold Since Ping went East to fight the bandit hordes And left me sorely lacking clothes and food. 45 The monster Wei spread calumnies and lies, My military pension was denied. Yet Baochuan ne’er by hardship was cast down, With these two hands I labored night and day, My neighbors succored me in times of need, 50 State charity I neither took nor sought, And thus survived as year succeeded year Awaiting Ping’s return to our cold cave. That blackguard Wei once strove to harm my Ping, Whate’er he suffers now is well deserved. 55 My father bade me take another man, But Ping returned in honor to our home, Baochuan his wife is pure and undefiled. Skies clear, sun shines, all nature is in bliss, Hardship is at an end and joy is here. 60 On this my father’s birthday, to our home Come officers and courtiers, friends and kin, Among them surely comes the demon Wei How will that chancellor regard me now? The one most likely to win the dog...