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76 Contentment Howdoesonegoaboutdeterminingwhenoneiscontent,or­miserable, or just doing all right? When does one reach a point at which one believes some action is necessary to change dissatisfaction? I began to grapple with these questions as a result of several studies in the first few years of my postdoctoral research. One study involved assessing the motivations for suicide. Sometimes it appeared that fairly common setbacks or minor irritations precipitated suicidal behaviors. Another study involved neurotic Japanese young people who seemed to be suffering terribly from relatively commonplace adolescent shyness and feelings of self-doubt. Looking within myself, I too could find similar negative experiences and feelings. Yet I considered them only minor chords in a larger and more positive life melody. What made the difference? Why do the same sorts of problems lead to suicide in some people and not in others? At the upper end of the emotional spectrum, certainly, continuous euphoria is hard to sustain. Even when chemically induced there are problems of habituation, increasing psychological sensitivity thresholds to discomfort, and the practical difficulties of maintaining the supply of prescribed happiness. At the other end of the spectrum I suspect that there are some woes and miseries that we could all pretty much agree are such that they produce dissatisfaction, unhappiness, or despondency. 15 Contentment 77 Yet in between those end points how wide are our individual ranges of satisfaction and dissatisfaction? How broad is that intermediate range of feelings and experiences that we define as neither particularly pleasant nor unpleasant? How do I learn to evaluate, for example, the sense I have when I drift off along tangential paths of thought in the midst of writing this piece—pleasant or unpleasant? When is being alone pleasant and when unpleasant? How do I know when I am “fulfilling myself?” When I am “doing what needs doing” is that supposed to make me happy or satisfied or what? Some minds have a tendency to acknowledge life by feeling extremely good or suffering terribly. Those minds require life to be lived at the extremes of emotion. In the midst of making love or receiving applause or achieving some cherished goal, who hasn’t wished that the moment might go on and on? Who hasn’t regretted that this particular now must be replaced by other less glorious nows? ...

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