The Endarkenment

Boner Etiquette

42 boner Etiquette Please: be kind to boners. Nothing ruins an evening quicker than catching a glimpse of a demoralized boner sobbing into its foreskin. Remember the boner is always half full. Most boners sleep upside down in caves, ready to flutter into the world at the drop of a bra strap. Boners move in packs—rarely will you see one wandering alone in a train station. Look closer and you’ll usually find a second boner bobbing nearby. But it’s the lone boner, the Oswald boner, you must watch out for. Whatever you do, don’t challenge it. Don’t stare it directly in its eye. * ...