V
Valor, n. A soldierly compound of vanity, duty and the gambler's hope. "Why have you halted?" roared the commander of a division at Chickamauga , who had ordered a charge; "move forward,sir, at once." "General," said the commander of the delinquent brigade, "I am persuaded that any further display of valor by my troops will bring them into collision with the enemy." Vanity, n. The tribute of a fool to the worth of the nearestass. They saythat hens do cackle loudest when There's nothing vital in the eggs they've laid; And there are hens, professingto have made A study of mankind, who saythat men Whose business 'tis to drive the tongue or pen Make the most clamorous fanfaronade O'er their most worthless work; and I'm afraid They're not entirely different from the hen. Lo! the drum-major in his coat of gold, His blazing breeches and high-towering cap— Imperiously pompous, grandly bold, Grim, resolute, an awe-inspiring chap! Who'd think this gorgeous creature's only virtue Is that in battle he will never hurt you? Hannibal Hunsiker. Virtues, n.fl. Certain abstentions. Vituperation, n. Satire, as understood by dunces and all such as suffer from an impediment in their wit. Vote, n. The instrument and symbol of a freeman's power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country. ...
OR
