Empire

The Novitiate

40 The Novitiate Before I lie down, place the heels of my feet on the edge of the worn wooden bed frame; my sister moves swiftly to the shelf, plucks a book. One hand steadies the heavy, black binding, her eyes focused on diagrams of the body. The beauty mark above her upper lip rises as she asks me if I want her to look. I could schedule an appointment, or purchase a predictor kit. As she turns to shut the window, I see light filling tree branches we played on every summer, hear a lawnmower a few houses down, smell barbeque coals and lighter fluid mixing with her perfume. I lift my skirt and prop my head up on pillows. She explains: “This might feel cool,” and slowly she peers inside. She says it would swell a deep purple, blood blotching the skin, the skin showing signs. ...