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Ten years have passed since I left the field. My experiences with northern New Jersey’s resourceful women have shaped who I am and how I see the world. I cannot imagine who I would have become without them. My relationships with some women stayed strong, while others gradually drifted away. A few women died, and their passing broke my heart. For a long time, the memory of their deaths kept me from looking for women who had wandered out of my life. I was afraid to discover who had lived and who had died. When I finally began searching for survivors, a part of me held my breath. Who would be left alive? To my surprise, I was able to find out what happened to every woman in this study. There were happy reunions with some women. Others talked with me over the phone. A third group had distanced themselves from the communities in which we originally met, but their caseworkers, clinicians, acquaintances, and friends knew where they were and what had happened to them in the intervening years. In all, seven women died. Three were part of the average-capital group. Two were part of the broad-capital group. Both women in the middle group died. But the differences between these groups became most striking when I discovered who was flourishing and who was struggling. All four of the average-capital survivors grappled with health problems, depression, isolation, and/or loss. Most had become disconnected from their clinicians and some had dropped out of social service case management. None appeared particularly satisfied with their lives. In contrast, five of the six broad-capital survivors told me (or in some cases, others) that they were happy. They reported either good health or a strong recovery from prior health problems. Some had work they loved; others lived with nurturing families. Some enjoyed both. They all pursued projects they cared about. Each one had preserved long-term healing relationships with one or 173 Epilogue Sorrows and Joys more health care professionals. All had stories of happiness and accomplishment to share. The sixth survivor struggled with dementia, but even she asserted that there was purpose to her life. She, too, had maintained strong, long-term relationships with several health care professionals. Average Cultural Capital Paquita Halfway through my fieldwork, I came home from a summer vacation to discover that Paquita had died. Nini broke the news to me when I called to tell her I was home. When Nini had first introduced us, she had warned me that Paquita was deeply unhappy—she was trapped in an unsupportive marriage and isolated from friends and family. Even then, Nini was worried about Paquita’s long-term prospects, fearing that Paquita was too isolated and depressed to help. I was sad to learn of Paquita’s death, but sadder still to think of the things she missed while she was alive: a loving, supportive network of friends and allies, high quality health care, clinicians she trusted, and a happy marriage. I wished her life had been different. I believe she deserved more than she got both from the health care system and the community in which she lived. If there was any comfort in her story, it was in the last few months of her life. When we first met, she was living in a dark, run-down basement apartment that was barely wheelchair accessible. But a little over six months later her husband found a much nicer apartment in a better part of town. During my last few visits, Paquita showed off her new place and proudly told me how much better it was. This small bit of comfort was all I could find as I searched Paquita’s life for some sign of peace. Cristina The last time I saw Cristina, she told me that she didn’t think she had too many years left to live. She was floundering, living without a local support group. She was also anguishing over what to do about her brother, who had just moved in with her after his release from prison. He had returned to drugs, and she worried about his influence on her teenage son. As the only woman in a household of four, she did all the cooking, cleaning, and work of daily life herself. When she was sick, the work went undone. Without allies to offer her support and share her burdens, she was on her own. Recently, I visited the...

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