Facing the Khmer Rouge: A Cambodian Journey

Preface: Between Worlds

xiii PREFACE: BETWEEN WORLDS When Americans or Cambodians ask me, “Where are you from?” or “What nationality are you?” their insistent curiosity is demanding, like an interrogation , a test of loyalty. My answers are prefaced with hesitation perhaps because I want the best answer but I’m unsure what it is. This book is an attempt at a complete answer. My truth is difficult. You see, I don’t feel entirely Cambodian or completely American. Cambodia is my birthplace , with the Khmer culture always deep in my psyche, but America is my home and my life. How do I give a simple answer to these questions? My children are luckier. As they go through daycare, schools, neighborhoods , friendships, and jobs, they’ll hear those questions but they know they are Americans; they won’t be stumped. Otherwise, I hope this book will help them or, at least, remind their generation that some things must not, should not, be forgotten. I’m into my twenty-fourth year as a professional landscape architect for the USDA Forest Service. In 1988, the University of Oregon granted me a degree in landscape architecture focusing on environmental planning and design. I spent most of my career in Bend, Oregon. Today my family and I live in Greenfield, Wisconsin, in a two-story wooden house with a porch in front. Programmable water sprinklers water the little garden and the yard in front. The kitchen countertops are made of marble. The stainless steel sinks have hot and cold water and a switch chops up garbage. The living room is filled with compact discs, DVDs, and tapes, with a lazy couch and a huge flat-screen TV. The study has a computer with wireless access. Outside, my remote control opens and closes the garage, which has two late-model cars, tools, shoes, and boxes of stuff. Summer and winter clothes are packed tightly and neatly in several closets. There are bags and shoes, toys, bedspreads and towels, underwear and toiletries for each one of us. In short, we have just about everything that an average American household has, and a whole lot more. Our days are consumed by routines and discoveries, by traffic and tire chains, by food and entertainment. It’s such a good life in America that I can almost forget the swarms of flies on dead bodies or the boy soldiers who attempted to murder me near the shores of Tonle Sap Lake, when I was barely fifteen. 20 To Aranya Prathet Refugee Camp Buriram Provincial Prison And Refugee Holding Center Din Daeng Anlong Veng Srei Snam Sisophon Prek Tal Koh Mechrey Varin 68 6 202 67 6 Srae Noy Sway Leu Banteay Srei Sor Sdom To Poipet/Pailin Puok Airport Angkor Thom Angkor Wat Siem Reap Phnom Kroam Teuk Thlar Kralahn Prasat Bakong Angkor Chum Phnom Kulen Odor Meanchey Province Preah Vihear Province Kompong Thom Province Tonle Sap Lake (The Great Lake) LEGEND: Significant Sites 1970-78 (See Key) Escape Route Taken from 1970–78 Significant Monument/Temple Population Center (Town/Village) Siem Reap International Airport National Highway 6 (Pavement) Secondary Highway (Pavement) Rural Unpaved Road (Dirt Road) Boundary NORTH 0 15 Scale and site locations shown are approximate and for context only ©Map by Ronnie Yimsut December 2010 30 Miles SCALE Battambang Province Sisaketh Jail Surin Camp Choam 67 16 15 14 9 8 10 13 11 11 6 68 6 7 5 2 1 4 3 Sotr Nikom Domdek Rolous Chi Kraeng To Phnom Penh Kompong Phluk (Stilt Village) Chong Knearse (Floating Village) 12 17 19 18 Preah Vihear Temple Dong Rek Mountain Range CAMBODIA THAILAND Dong Rek Mountain Range Siem Reap Province, Kingdom of Cambodia Cambodia Context Map KEY: Significant Sites in Cambodia (1970 to 1978) No. Name 1 Wat Damnak 2 Sala Komrou 3 Domdek 4 Rolous 5 Krobey Riel 6 Keo Poeur 7 Kok Poh and Kork Putrea 8 Tapang 9 Kralahn 10 Wat Yieng 11 Ta Source Hill 12 Dorn Swar 13 Prey Roniem 14 Srae Noy 15 Resin Mountain 16 Deep Northern Jungle 17 Din Daeng Village 18 Sisaketh Jail 19 Buriram Provincial Prison and Refugee Holding Center 20 Aranya Prathet Refugee Camp For many years I denied my memories. In pursuit of the great American dream, I pushed away the haunting nightmares of the Khmer Rouge and I ignored those soft images of family now lost. Instead of examining my roots, I pressed ahead...