Make the Connection: Improve Your Communication at Work and at Home

CONTENTS

CONTENTS Acknowledgments, xiii Introduction, 1 Communication 101 1. Message Sent Does Not Equal Message Received, 9 2. Connecting Means Taking Risks, 11 3. Body Language Speaks Volumes, 12 4. Mushy Messages Don’t Cut It, 14 5. Lose the Jargon No One Understands, 16 6. When Less Is More, 17 7. Communication: A Matter of Life and Death, 19 8. The Q & A, 21 9. The Power of Questions, 22 10. The “Funnel” Approach, 24 11. George Bush—the Father—Learns New Tricks, 26 12. Andrew Cuomo Is No Mario When Communicating, 27 13. Communication Resolutions for a New Year, 29 The Power of Passion and Connecting with Others 14. Nine Tools of the Compelling Communicator, 33 15. Meet Sister Marianne McCann, 35 16. What’s Your CQ? (We’re Talking Communication Quotient), 37 17. “But I Have More Slides . . . ,” 38 18. Planning a Conference? No Detail Is Too Small, 40 19. Why Are We Here? 42 20. Q = A + 1, 43 21. What We Really Want from Our Leaders, 45 22. Most Great Speakers Are Made Not Born, 47 23. Mario Cuomo Speaks from the Heart, 49 24. Rudy Is a “Hit” at the Yogi Classic, 50 25. “Presidential” Presentation Matters a Lot, 52 26. Dean’s Scream Ended His Dream, 55 27. Why Kerry Didn’t Connect, 56 Leadership 28. “You Like Me . . . You Really Like Me!” 61 29. Attitude Is Just About Everything, 63 30. Take the Leadership Test, 64 31. Great Leaders Make Great Teachers, 66 32. Hank Keirsey Steps Up, 68 33. Great Leaders Aren’t Always in the Top Spot, 69 34. When Delegating, Don’t Undo, 71 35. The Challenge of Change, 73 36. With Feedback, Accentuate the Positive, 75 37. The Seven Deadly Sins of Leadership, 77 38. Ginny Bauer Leads with Her Heart, 78 39. Rudy’s Rules of Leadership, 80 40. Great Facilitation Pays Big Dividends, 82 41. Jack Welch Leads “from the Gut,” 84 42. Bill Parcells a Leadership Guru? Not So Fast, 86 viii Contents Organizational Life 43. Micromanaging Doesn’t Avoid Mistakes, 91 44. Downsizing Requires Quality Communication, 93 45. Change Can Be Good, 95 46. Swimming with the Fishes, 97 47. NASA: A Problem of Culture, 100 48. FBI and CIA: Not on the Same Page, 102 49. Plans for My Succession: Are You Nuts? 103 50. Yankees’ Manager Torre: A Great Leader on Any Field, 105 At Work 51. Job Hunters Need to Prepare, 109 52. Invest Early in New Employees, 111 53. Handling Employee Complaints, 113 54. Don’t Hold a Meeting If . . . , 115 55. Let’s Make a Deal, 117 56. Communication Is the Key to Great Teamwork, 119 57. Workplace Debating 101, 120 58. The Dangers of Multitasking, 122 59. Those Constant Interruptions, 124 60. Speak Slowly, Clearly When Leaving a Message, 125 61. Using PowerPoint? Better Have a Plan B, 127 62. PowerPoint Is Great If . . . , 129 63. Tips for Company Parties, 131 Motivation 64. “You Have Two Weeks: Tick-Tock,” 137 65. A Pat on the Back Pays Big Dividends, 139 66. “You Need It When?” 141 67. A Resistant Audience Presents a Big Opportunity, 142 Contents ix The Customer Is Always Right 68. The Customer Is Always Right, 147 69. Customer Service Should Never Be Subpar, 149 70. “Guerrilla Marketing” Makes Sense, 150 71. Jack Mitchell “Hugs” His Customers, 152 Communicating with Strength in Tough Situations 72. Confrontational and Contentious Are Not the Same Thing, 157 73. Going Beyond Honesty to Empathy, 159 74. “The Chandelier Is Perfect—for the Waldorf!” 161 75. “You’re Such a Jerk” and Other Insults, 163 76. The Real “No Spin” Zone, 164 77. The Feds Are Not on the Same Page with the Anthrax Scare, 166 78. A Respectful “No” Helps Business Go, 168 79. How to Deal with Workplace Bullies, 170 80. Sweating It Out at Fox, 171 81. Don’t Play Word Games When Apologizing, 173 82. Bush’s Blind Spot, 175 83. Lessons from the McGreevey Resignation Crisis, 177 84. Martha Whips Up Real Thin Image Spin, 180 85. Communication Crisis for the Catholic Church, 182 86. Doctor, Doctor, Give Me the News, 184 87. What’s Up, Doc? 186 Relationships, Kids, and Communication 88. Communicating with Our Kids, 191 89. Helping Our Kids Stand and Deliver, 193 x Contents 90. Communicating with Kids about a Scary...