The World of a Tiny Insect: A Memoir of the Taiping Rebellion and Its Aftermath

Part 2.

79 Part Two Taizhou has been a desolate spot on the distant seashore ever since ancient times. Its people are probably what Ban Gu’s work refers to as the “people of Eastern Ti.”1 During the Tang dynasty, Taizhou gradually became better known. And yet, when Zheng Qian was demoted to administrative aide of Taizhou, Du Fu wrote a poem to send him off, in which he regarded Taizhou as a foreign land, for it was a faraway border region with pestilential miasmas, not the kind of place that should be visited by a gentleman. Bo Daoyou claimed that it was the dwelling place of gods, and Sun Xinggong depicted it as an immortal isle.2 This is just what an old saying describes: “Mountains and groves, bells and tripods—different people love different things.”3 I have already turned forty, the age of “having no doubts,” but I still live in shameful obscurity.4 Rather than merely breathing in the world of men and being of no use for my home and country, I might as well seek out the mountain retreat and rest my spirit beyond the cloud vapors. If I 1 Ban Gu (32–92) was a historian and writer who authored The History of Han (Han shu). 2 Bo Daoyou, a native of Shaoxing, was a Buddhist monk who lived in the second half of the fourth century. Sun Xinggong was Sun Chuo (314–371), a prominent Eastern Jin poet who composed the famous “Poetic Exposition on Roaming Mount Tiantai” (You Tiantai shan fu). 3 “Mountains and groves” represent a reclusive life outside the public sphere, while “bells and tripods” refer to the lifestyle of an official. 4 Confucius remarked that he no longer had doubts when he became forty years old (Analects 2.4). 80 The World of a Tiny Insect do that, then even with this heaven-forsaken body I might still manage to enjoy the blessings reserved for those with a fine reputation. I would be able to discuss poetry and classics as well as the principles of benevolence and righteousness with the young; I would also be able to chat about farming matters with old peasants. Not to mention there would be Daoist adepts and Buddhist monks who could entertain me; cranes in the autumn and gibbons in the spring to befriend me and quell my mundane thoughts. I would love to ride on the clouds and roam Heavenly Pillar Mountain. Therefore, on the day after I returned to Ningbo, I paid a visit to Chen Yuyu, who was a native of Tiantai. I expressed my admiration for him and asked him to help me find a small house there. Surely Yuyu would do something about this. Birth and Early Childhood I was born on the first day of the first month in the jiayin year of the Xianfeng era [January 29, 1854]. At the time, my late father was fortysix years old, so he nicknamed me “Four-six.” I went to school at the age of four. My teacher was Mr. Zhang, whose personal name was De and courtesy name was Wangzong. He was an aging Licentiate Scholar. My classmate was our neighbor’s son, Wang Kanghou, whose personal name was Jin. He was born one day before me, so I would address him as “Elder Brother Thirty,” and he would call me “Little Brother First.”5 As a child I did not like playing. I had a dozen cousins, who fooled around together and were sometimes as noisy as a boiling cauldron. I, on the other hand, just watched them with wide eyes. Occasionally, I would get into a fight with them, and none proved my match. I was fond of sweets, and would cry for sweets day and night. One day, I mistook alum for sugar and put it in my mouth. It tasted so horrible that I have stayed away from sugar ever since. My mother still teases me about it. I was capricious by nature. My wet nurse would put dozens of toys in front of me to amuse me; but in the midst of pleasure, I would get up, toss them away, and leave them behind without ever glancing back, as if I had been suddenly seized by a deep sadness. Looking back now, I wonder 5 Wang Kanghou was born on the thirtieth day of the twelfth month, hence “Elder Brother Thirty.” [18.226.166.214] Project MUSE (2024-04-25 05:13 GMT...