The Unintentional Adventures of the Bland Sisters: The Jolly Regina by Kara LaReau (review)

Announcement: The publisher, Amulet Books, informs us that Kara LaReau’s book reviewed as The Unintentional Adventures of the Bland Sisters: The Booty Myth has had a title change to The Unintentional Adventures of the Bland Sisters: The Jolly Regina.

The Bland sisters, Jaundice and Kale, love a routine (oatmeal for breakfast, watching the grass grow for afternoon fun, Dr. Snoote’s Illustrated Children’s Dictionary for bedtime reading) and hate surprises, so imagine the shock they experience when they find themselves kidnapped onto a pirate ship. The Jolly Regina is manned by a group of women, the leader of whom claims she made a deal with Jaundice and Kale’s long-lost parents for the sisters’ servitude. So off they set, scrubbing the deck and assisting Fatima the cook as Deadeye Delilah hunts down her sister Captain Ann Tennille. Plenty of references to booty and poop decks (along with the depantsing of the entire male crew of the Testostero) make for easy humor, while more subtle comedy comes from the deadpan third-person narration. The all-female ensemble exhibits familiar school dynamics, with a bullying queen bee surrounded by her minions, the overweight Fatima as their target, so the Bland sisters give Fatima the support (and a stirring sea chantey) to be who she is. That message takes over rather a lot of the book, but the idea that you are allowed to be yourself regardless of others’ expectations is a significant one for young readers, and it’s underlined by the fact that Kale and Jaundice choose to return to their comforting routine even after being offered more adventure. Black and white illustrations owe much to Quentin Blake and add to the antic Dahl-esque flavor of the story.