- Thinking About Getting One
Get one that’s not from around here, they said.Get one on eBay.Get one that will last, so you won’t have to wait in line for another.Get two!Get one without serrated edges.Get a used one that runs good.Get one that’s solidly built in the US of A.Get one before someone notices you don’t yet have one.Get one that won’t invite theft.Get one that won’t ruin the carpet.Get one with an extended warranty.Get one with retractable straps, and arrows to show which way is up.Get an old-fashioned German one.Get one that won’t require any books For Dummies.Don’t even think about getting one online.Get one with a remote.Get one before you’re thirty.Get one you don’t have to assemble yourself.Get one that doesn’t keep you up at night.Get one that makes you want to stay up.Get one without any holes you don’t make yourself.Get one that won’t constantly remind you that you’ve got one. [End Page 82]
J. ALLYN ROSSER’s fourth collection of poems, Mimi’s Trapeze, was published in 2014 from the University of Pittsburgh Press. She teaches at Ohio University.