When a Tree Falls, a Bush Grows: Republican Strategy to Elect Jeb Bush

The same day that George W. Bush won the 2004 presidential election, scientists announced that the Arctic glaciers are melting at an accelerated speed as a result of increased global warming. This is evidence that the current administration is using its environmental policies to try to flood the Northeast, thereby drowning all U.S. citizens north of Virginia. This will give the Republican Party a guaranteed majority for decades to come, while at the same time removing Canada as a refuge for secular humanists. Here is how W. plans to use environmental policy to destroy the power of the remaining blue states and ensure his brother Jeb's victory in 2008.