Counselling for Toads: A Psychological Adventure (review)

Robert de Board. Counselling for Toads: A Psychological Adventure. London and New York: Routledge, 1997.

I first heard of Robert de Board's Counselling for Toads at the 1999 Conference on Modern Critical Approaches to Children's Literature, where Peter Hunt delivered the keynote address. Peter focused much of his talk on his concerns about the status of children's literature studies within the academic community. After his presentation, I had a long talk with Peter, during which I raised a delicate question. I asked him if his defensiveness about the status of children's literature studies might have a personal connection. Perhaps, I suggested, he was projecting his own insecurities onto his chosen profession. I half expected him to tell me to get lost, but we ended up having a stimulating conversation about the different ways that people cope with their insecurities. In the course of this conversation, Peter mentioned Counselling for Toads, which he said deals with this topic in an insightful way. Now that I have read the book, I completely agree.

Counselling for Toads is a serious book with a fanciful premise. Intended as a layperson's introduction to the process and practice of psychotherapy, this book follows Toad as he progresses through a series of therapy sessions with a counselor called Heron. The book has some of the trappings of a novel, but it would be unfair to judge it as a work of literature. The author, who himself is a psychotherapist, is much more concerned with demystifying the experience of undergoing counseling than with creating a true sequel to Kenneth Grahame's The Wind in the Willows. Readers who are looking for a continuation of Grahame's story would be better served by William Horwood's The Willows in Winter (1993), Toad Triumphant (1995), and The Willows and Beyond (1996). However, readers who are interested in delving into Toad's psyche would likely find much of interest in de Board's book.

Counselling for Toads begins with Toad plunging into one of his periodic bouts of depression, but this time he cannot seem to snap out of it. His friends become so concerned about his mental state that they arrange for him to see Heron. Toad reluctantly agrees to go, but at first he is rather uncooperative with Heron's attempts to get him to talk about his feelings. Gradually, however, Toad begins to open up.

After a few sessions, it becomes clear that Toad's problems stem from his strained relationship with his parents, especially his father. Toad initially represses the underlying anger he feels toward his demanding and emotionally detached father, but in time he begins to admit some truths about his upbringing. During one therapy session, Heron asks Toad how he remembers his father, and Toad answers, "As stern and disapproving. I always wanted his love and attention, but I never got it." Once Toad acknowledges his true feelings toward his father, he begins to understand how his odd behavior patterns are tied to the coping mechanisms he developed during his childhood. At one point, for example, he tells Heron:

I always wanted to please them [his parents]. I'm not sure if I ever succeeded, but I remember clearly wanting them to be pleased and proud of me. . . . Perhaps that is why I developed a tendency to show off. They never seemed pleased or impressed with what I did, so I indulged in extravagant and stupid behavior to try and gain their attention.

Perhaps because de Board hopes to encourage readers to feel less reluctant about seeking psychotherapy, he presents Toad's future in a fairly optimistic light. Heron tells Toad, "You have a choice. Will you obey the voice of your dead father, or will you give yourself permission and take your own authority." Toad chooses to take responsibility for his own life, and by the end of the book, he is marching happily into the future...