Resolutions of the 2005 APCG Meeting, Phoenix, Arizona

WHEREAS the Geography faculty of Arizona State University and Mesa Community College has hosted the 68th meeting of the Association of Pacific Coast Geographers with considerable zest, skill, and savoir faire, and

WHEREAS we have all benefited from their splendid efforts at organization, planning, and hospitality, and

WHEREAS we particularly want to recognize the efforts of our tireless conference co-chairs, Dan Arreola and Chris Lukinbeal; our program organizers Steve Bass, Nicole Ceverny, and Duncan Shaeffer; our cartographer Barbara Trapido-Lurie; the financial support from ASU Dean Alan Artibise, ASU Geography Chair Richard Aspinall, and MCC Vice President for Academic Affairs Gaile Mee; and the assistance of our stalwart and able field trip leaders, as well as the innumerable, friendly, smiling, and invaluable student assistants, and

WHEREAS, and regretfully, the ubiquitous arm of the Resolutions Committee, now bolstered by satellites, cell phones, GPS units, iPods, and TIVOs has been able to extend its all-enveloping reach, thereby having been made aware of instances and occasions that because of their singularity merit, no, we say, require a footnote and recognition in the accounts of this meeting, to wit, and

WHEREAS our host committee, to prove, most especially to Californians, that water is no problem in Phoenix (of which we were repeatedly reminded), sponsored a float rip down the Salt River, and

WHEREAS to illustrate that the real quantifiers are still in Tucson, not Tempe, for Susan Sargent's field trip, the 14 registrants found themselves confronted with a 15-passenger van that sat only 12, and

WHEREAS Professor Jennifer Helzer, upon entering the environs of the APCG meeting on the first day, saw free food and immediately filled her plate, only to find out she was at a lawyers' convention, not the APCG, but she still ate the food, and

WHEREAS Chris Lukinbeal, who was often found looking for his dolly, was later seen sitting cozily with her, unknown to his wife, and

WHEREAS one of the most prominent papers at these meetings focused on the ubiquity of garbage, yet attendees found nary a recycling container in sight, and

WHEREAS the vegan table at the BBQ featured a cheese plate, so that the question arose as to whether this was the new Southwestern vegan cuisine, and what plant was the source of this cheese, and

WHEREAS to finally cater to the vertically dyslexic attendees of our meetings, our hosts displayed all directional signs upside down, profoundly turning around our organization, and

WHEREAS for the first time, because of the massive attendance at these meetings, actual people were seen in downtown Phoenix on a Saturday, and

WHEREAS prior to a presentation on the city of Catania, Sicily, Bob Richardson, an officer of this organization, found it necessary to blurt out for all to hear, quote, "I live on Catania Way," and

WHEREAS APCG found it necessary to import student presenters from Italy to show some of our senior members how to make an oral presentation—clear maps, clear graphs, and clear organization, and

WHEREAS suggesting a new era may be before us, Larry Ford was part of three different presentations and showed not a single slide in any of them, and

WHEREAS an APCG abstract finally captured the essence of the APCG balcony cocktail hour with the following verbiage, and we quote, "to fracture and yet inter-textualize the spatial and temporal elements from which the characters…experience, share, and continuously (re)-produce and (re)-annihilate their identities of addiction," further reinforcing our manifestations of (to quote part of a paper title) "…the Neo-Noir Impulse," and,

WHEREAS and finally, the Resolutions Committee found itself profoundly frustrated at every turn by a lack of material for these resolutions because of the truly superior organization of these meetings, thus laying down the challenge for Alec Murphy of the University of Oregon to remedy this situation next year, or we may have to abolish this committee,

THEREFORE BE IT RESOLVED that we profoundly thank our host geographers from ASU and MCC for a truly splendid meeting —well-organized, well-attended, full of...