Resolutions of the 2011 APCG Meeting San Francisco, California

WHEREAS, the Geography Department at San Francisco State University has hosted this 74th meeting of the APCG with a sense of grace, cordiality and attentiveness, and

WHEREAS, we have all marched forward intellectually and professionally as a result of their outstanding organizational efforts and superb planning, and

WHEREAS, we especially want to acknowledge the undying labors of the meeting chair Nancy Wilkenson and her principal coordinators, Jerry Davis, Marilyn Hope Smulyan, and Erica Thomas, as well as the contributions of Jim Craine, Caitlin Steele, David Deis, and Rachel Cunningham, plus a bevy of dedicated student volunteers, nevertheless, it has come to the attention of the ever-vigilant, ever-watchful, ever-observant Resolutions Committee, now equipped with satellite imagery, interstellar tele-optometry, hidden cameras, tweets, and shadowy correspondents, that certain events and happenings require special mention because of their ethereal, je ne sais quoi aspects, to wit:

WHEREAS, new field trip methods were introduced on the afternoon excursion to the Presidio, where the field trip leader refused to accompany the group to the start site, then set a new world's speed record for walking backward during the trip, and

WHEREAS, at the end of said trip, an unusual concept of participant return was employed, requiring some trippers to find their own way back to the hotel, and

WHEREAS, on the all-day coastal field trip, a new standard was utilized in terms of vertical distance for passenger entry into vehicles, requiring either a pogo stick or catapult launch mechanism, and

WHEREAS, a novel arrangement of host hotel geography appeared, with meeting rooms, events, and distinguished geographers residing in one hotel block—let's say, the "San Francisco Wing"—and the rest of us housed several furlongs distant in, let's say, the "Oakland Annex," accessible only by walking thru a Denny's restaurant and ordering a breakfast slam, and

WHEREAS, Treasurer Bob Richardson, with no regard for his carbon footprint, yesterday drove two hours to Sacramento, to retrieve forgotten student award checks, and in the process further lowered our precious petroleum reserve, and

WHEREAS, some members believe they have evaded the reach of the Resolutions Committee by committing notable acts after the Resolutions are read—this is not the case—and so we note that Past President Dolly Freidel was able to have her cell phone interrupt her while at the lectern at the San Diego meetings, and then again during her Presidential Address last year at this time in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho, and

WHEREAS, in an attempt to emulate San Francisco weather, room temperatures were set at a marvelous degree of variability—polar in the Mendocino, tropical in the Tiburon—requiring the old San Francisco "layers of clothing" strategy for attendees, and

WHEREAS, in an effort to double the presence of Ph.D. programs, the Program Committee cleverly slipped Oregon's Alec Murphy into two sessions though he had only one presentation to give, and

WHEREAS, during Friday's 8:00 opening sessions, four of eight student presenters failed to show, reportedly a result of excessive liquid appreciation the evening before, and

WHEREAS, Gary Cummisk from Dickenson State University appeared on our program at the insistence of leaders in his state, still trying to convince us that North Dakota is necessary, and

WHEREAS, Jonathan Taylor, CSU Fullerton, claimed to be presenting a first, that is introducing drugs at an APCG meeting, apparently having failed to inhale at the Humboldt State meetings, and

WHEREAS, not to cause alarm, but there are signs on the wall of this room that state "WARNING! Chemicals known to the State of California to cause cancer, birth defects or other reproductive harm, may be present in food or beverage sold or served here," but we say "Don't worry, just make sure you didn't eat anything!," and

WHEREAS, in truth,

THEREFORE, BE IT FULLY RESOLVED that we offer warm and admiring thanks to our generous hosts, who have worked diligently and quite successfully to provide us with...