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11 Simon Says He said, “The angles of our house remind me of solid geometry.” “Forget geometry,” she scoffed, “I’ll take the lawn and the roses.” Paging from news to the crosswords, he said, “A woman who fights bulls in Spain says strength is secondary to intelligence in bullfighting—the bull is always stronger.” “Any woman who fights a bull on foot,” she said, “is dumber than the dumbest bull.” “Who was the conqueror who razed the cities of his enemies and sowed the ground with salt to keep them dead forever?” “Who cares?” she huffed. “You know,” he said, “in heels you walk like a pair of scissors pointed down—closing and opening.” “High heels flatter a woman’s legs,” she said, “and that’s enough.” “The nude bathers of Renoir look swell without high heels.” 12 “Too heavy in the thighs,” she smirked, “each pink and tubby one of them.” “Adam took Eve before heels were invented.” “What choice did she have?” “When you think about it,” he said, “Eden was just a nudist camp.” “Don’t think about it.” “Why?” “I know where you’re heading.” “Isn’t loving meant to be fun?” “Serious fun, but it comes in waves, and frankly I’m not feeling wavy at the moment.” Folding the paper, he said, “Tell me the opposite of maybe.” “Hell no or let’s go, depending on my mood.” “I think it’s time I called it a night.” “It’s not even dark.” “From where I sit, it’s getting darker by the minute.” “Tell me,” she asked, “is wanting me the same as loving me?” “What’s the difference? “One time you said your body’s never yours until it’s with my body.” “Did I say that?” 13 “You said it before and after, and it still makes sense.” “Sense or nonsense, it’s the truth.” “I think I feel the same . . .” “Before or after?” “Now.” ...

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