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Chapter Sixty-three
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261 C Chapter Sixty-three ello?” the voice said in his ears, a voice he recognized immediately, and suddenly he found himself trembling, his heart beating a little faster. He had forgotten how it would be and that idea that maybe he was just wasting his time, that the man at the other end was not even going to talk to him once he knew who was calling. Why should he after…? “Hello?” Jude felt beats of sweat start to form on his face even as the night was cold and he was all soaked from the constantly drizzling rain. What was he going to say? How was he going to tell the man at the other end that it was him calling? What was the man going to say when he heard his voice? Jude took a deep breath and felt the hand holding the phone shaking. How was he going to talk to the man when he had spat on his gift at first? How was he going to tell the man that all he wanted now was a second chance, for the hand of the clock to turn back? “Hello?” the voice said again, “Who is this?” Jude could sense some annoyance or thought so. What am I going to do? Jude parted his lips to say something but nothing came out, just a noisy breath that sounded like a sigh. The man was going to stop the call; the man was simple going to drop the call. He could see that in his mind’s eyes, the man dropping the call and cursing the unknown caller. And what he knew was that if the man did something like that, he was not going to have the strength to call again. Jude tried to open his mouth again, and it was suddenly dry, very dry. I’m simply going to drop the call myself, he thought suddenly, the idea sounding very interesting to him, I’m simply going to stop the call and go back and see Mabel. Why are you here? I’ll go back and sleep and tomorrow everything will be fine. New things can happen in my life, things that might be better than… “Hello?” the voice said again, “Who is this?” “H 262 What are you doing? What do you think you’re doing? Jude ran a dry tongue over his equally dry lips and closed his eyes. “Who is…?” He said in a tiny voice that was almost inaudible, “Eric.” “Yes? Who is this?” “It’s me.” “Oh.” A crazy thought came to his head, a thought that was so crazy he did not want to think about it; it was as if Eric had been expecting him to call. “Oh,” Eric said, “Okay.” “It’s me, Jude.” “Yes, are you okay?” “Yes, I think so,” Jude said. Then why did you call? He expected Eric to say that in a sarcastic way, but Eric said nothing and they were silent for a while, each man waiting for the other to say something. You can still stop the call, padre. “Are you sure you’re okay?” Eric asked finally. What are you doing? You can still drop the call and walk away from all this insanity. You can still… “Hello? Are you still there?” Jude nodded, “Yes, I’m here.” Drop the call and walk away! I’m not… Just do it. I can’t… You can do it. “Jude? Are you still there?” You can do it. I can’t. Yes, you can do it. It’s the best thing you can do. No, you don’t understand. “Jude, are you still there?” Jude swallowed hard, actually swallowing nothing but dry air that caused his throat to hurt as it went down. [3.85.224.214] Project MUSE (2024-03-29 07:40 GMT) 263 What are you trying to involve yourself in, man? What are you trying to do? Who are you even talking with? I must… No! You can… It must be… “Jude, are you there?” Jude closed his eyes, “Yes,” he whispered. Eric cleared his throat and said, “You know if there’s something you want to talk about or something you think I can do for you, I’m all ears.” Jude nodded and wiped off some water or sweat that was almost entering his left eye. “We’re friends, remember?” Jude nodded again as if Eric could see him. Don’t say anything. You still have...