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192 Though falling short of medals on account of the fierce competitivity, both Louis Tobi Mbida and Gustav Essaka must come for honourable mention in these awards. The former, who is the spineless offspring of a noble name, cannot but keep close to actual power. The latter’s ambition for tenancy of the Etoudi palace was frustrated by lack of the caution fee of 1.5 million francs. Something that should not have surpassed any candidate who could boast of up to 150 supporters, contributing only ten thousand francs each. We can see clearly now. The grain has been separated from the chaff, the men from the boys. Let the so-called leaders trade horses and cross carpets. We, the commoners, know where our interest lies, and it is not in two places. We anxiously await October 11th . 6 68 As the Countdown to Zero Hour Begins (Published October 8-15, 1992) A flash of lightening. A clap of thunder. A ferocious lion (monarch of the forest and open savannah alike!). And the affirmation: PAUL BIYA, MY PRESIDENT. That is the genius, the l’idee original, of some Frenchman, on behalf of Dr. Biya’s re-election campaign. The fellow has done great harm and an incalculable disservice to Biya. The idea is simply weird and revolting. I thought it was the English who were supposed to have such a diabolic sense of humour. Representing Dr. Biya as a terrifying ferocious lion, a predator even on predators, which itself lives a life of absolute idleness, but feeds on all other animals, trampling with careless arrogant abandon on their fundamental animal rights, is simply too damaging. I don’t think that any Cameroonian, even the greatest Biya-hater, could have conceived such a thing. May be it serves Dr. Biya right for having refused to follow his own advice: consommez Camerounais. The sad thing is that this imagery, which paints Biya as a marauding ferocious king of the jungle, at the second moment of perception and reflection, is quite apt and appropriate. What the 193 Frenchman has done in effect is to translate into powerful symbols one half of the Machiavellian political philosophy that MIGHT IS RICHT. But this diabolic descendant of the Gauls forgot that even Machiavelli himself said that the political leader should combine these qualities of the lion with those a fox. Because even though the lion is all powerful, it is not intelligent enough to recognize traps, whereas the fox, which is weak and powerless, is a master at recognizing and dodging traps. If Dr. Biya had any of the qualities of a fox, he wouldn’t be seeking re-election; he would long have been enjoying his retirement in peace, tranquillity and affluence. Naked power has its limits. Bribery, corruption, blackmail and intimidation have their limits. Trickery and lies have their limits. Even fraud has its limits. As zero hour approaches, minute by minute, when our nearfuture ex-President will cross the narrow divide between potentiality and actuality, when his “is” will change to “was,” the son of Gobata cannot help casting a retrospective glance at his own efforts towards that long expected mutation. Since the inception of NO TRIFLING MATTER, Bi Mvondo has come in for a fair share of my caustic, destructively constructive criticism. The approaching zero hour has been awaited in the manner of the messiah, and with its advent, I can chant my nunc dimistis with one side of the mouth, because the struggle will surely continue, though on a different gear. Personally, I have nothing against Dr. Paul Biya. If inscrutable fate had not catapulted him to the summit of dictatorial power, with disastrous consequences for all of us, he might, in fact, be among the more likeable type of Cameroonians. But as a leader/dictator, he has been an unmitigated disaster. My critical comments are objectively aimed at the Cameroonian society at large. I will continue in the same spirit when Ni John Fru Ndi or whoever else replaces Biya at unity palace. I hope that he would, unlike Biya, listen to advice and benefit from honest criticism. It was as far back as 1986 that I saw in one prophetic-like flash of intuitive insight that the Biya regime was driving Cameroon down a slope into hell. By then most Cameroonians were still naively living in a fool’s paradise. The situation is very different today, happily. I remember an evening towards the end of 1986 when some young...

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