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SWEET ARETHE USES OF ADVERSITY: Fourth Siste r Violet (1906-1998) E va Le e pu t dow n th e lette r whic h sh e ha d bee n readin g alou d to he r olde r sister , Evelyn , an d sai d wit h a knowin g smile , 'Violet i s ver y happ y an d contente d bot h wit h lif e i n Shangha i and wit h Reginald. ' Sh e spok e i n Cantones e bu t use d th e Wester n names a s wa s th e custo m amon g Westernize d Chinese , th e trul y Westernized one s a s wel l a s thos e eage r t o emulat e them . T gues s yo u ar e right, ' responde d Evelyn , 'w e kno w he r s o well . Otherwise, you would think a woman a s young as Violet would expres s herself wit h mor e enthusiasm , mor e hyperbole , mor e emotion . He r letter sound s lik e a newspape r report. ' Bu t bot h wome n kne w tha t Violet, thei r younge r siste r an d th e thir d daughte r o f the King' s fathe r and hi s firs t wife , know n t o th e whol e househol d a s Seung Mah o r Superior Grandmother , wa s reticent an d low-key ; this was particularl y true i n th e expressio n o f emotions . Thi s i s no t t o sa y tha t sh e di d no t feel — quit e th e contrary , sh e fel t deeply , bu t sh e di d no t wea r he r heart o n he r sleeve . 'Stil l water s ru n deep, ' a n America n teache r a t her schoo l ha d commente d o f her. Sh e no t onl y felt ; sh e als o thought . I will no t g o so far a s t o say tha t sh e wa s ' a nake d thinkin g heart' , bu t she wa s muc h mor e sensitiv e t o othe r peopl e an d thei r situation s an d their feeling s tha n th e averag e person . If , fo r example , sh e wa s eatin g 102 AL L TH E KING' S WOME N at a restauran t wit h onl y a fe w othe r customers , sh e woul d worr y s o much fo r th e proprieto r tha t sh e wouldn' t b e abl e t o enjo y he r meal . She worrie d abou t hawker s sellin g banana s whic h wer e alread y overripe; sh e worrie d abou t hawker s sellin g bananas , whateve r thei r condition. Indeed, sh e worried abou t hawkers in general and ragamuffi n children an d beggar s an d al l th e jetsa m an d flotsa m o f humanit y teeming i n th e street s o f Guangzhou , wher e sh e wa s born , an d Hon g Kong, where sh e followed he r oldest brother, an d no w Shanghai, wher e marriage t o th e scio n o f on e o f Wuxi's wealthies t an d mos t importan t industrial familie s ha d take n her . This i s not to say that sh e constantl y talked abou t he r concern s o r tha t sh e wa s a killjoy . Sh e ha d a quie t sense o f humou r an d a n outwar d cal m an d placidit y whic h wer e attractive t o man y me n wear y o f shril l an d overtalkativ e women . W e Cantonese hav e an expressio n fo r her demeanou r — daifong, literall y 'big square' , no t coquettis h no r kittenis h bu t wit h grac e an d th e demeanour o f a woma n fro m a 'big ' family . The Viole t wh o ha d writte n t o he r sister s i n th e fifteent h yea...

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