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18 the widows’ handbook Is He Saved? Carolyn Stephens The night Jeff lay dying, the overnight CNA asked me if my husband was saved. Saved? Out of context, I had no idea what she was asking me. Is this some medical term I should know? Organ donation? Wh—OH! I stupidly, finally, stammered, you mean, like, in Jesus? Yes, she patiently replied. Is he saved? Another day, I might have taken offense or refused to answer such a personal question coming from, essentially, an employee, someone whom we had known for only a week. But that night, all layers of social fabric between us were stripped away and we were just two people caring for my husband, who was clearly, quietly, failing in the room next door. Saved? She was asking as a Christian, plainly concerned with the repose of Jeff’s soul for all eternity. I answered from the heart and without planning what to say. We are spiritual people, I said. We believe there are powers in this world we don’t understand. We believe the world is made of energy that may change but does not dissipate. We believe in kindness and trying to do no harm as we go through life. But since you are asking me this question, I am sure that our beliefs are different from yours. To answer what I think you are asking: He is not afraid to die. He is not afraid of what comes next. He is not afraid. ...

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