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cinco de mayo

62 cinco de mayo i look through a book of names as thick as a man’s fist looking for the name of a man who died as though he were sleeping Jose Angel Ortiz my finger finds his name on the ninth panel of the vietnam veteran’s memorial a cloud of dust and the faintest flickering of light when the grenade put his name into the black granite i was not there i was not born yet i know he died hardly looking dead at all when my father in law identified Jose Angel Ortiz he looked like he was asleep still this is not 1968 and the faintest flickering of light it is 1998 and people believe cinco de mayo is about cruising federal bouelevard cinco de mayo is not about cruising not about what flag we wave but about memory i offer that it is about names 63 Jose Angel Ortiz was returned to texas wrapped in stars not a marine not even alive his mother not concerned with which flag covered her boy cinco de mayo a boy cruises federal until his car runs out of gas he pushes it slowly toward the station he does not make it a bullet to the head a boy dies outside a convenience store i have already forgotten his name cinco de mayo it was the fifth of may can you remember that boy’s name did his mother wrap him in a flag did he die as though he were asleep i rub the name Jose Angel Ortiz onto a white piece of paper the pencil catching fragments of letters and partial names which surround the name i have come looking for it is a beautiful name say it with me Jose Angel Ortiz ...