Mark Twain Speaking

19. The Guests

82 MARK TWAIN SPEAKING· 19 · In the speeches made abroad in the 1870s a recurrent note is that of amity between England and America, Mark Twain developing the theme with his usual blend ofhumor and seriousness. At an early stage ofhis public career he was rehearsing for the role he defined many years later as "self-appointed ambassador-at-large ofthe United States ofAmerica-without salary." The Guests St. Andrews Society Dinner, London, November 29, 1873 I feel singularly at home in this Scottish society. I have spent so much time in Scotland that everything connected with Scotland is familiar to me. Last summer I spent five weeks in that magnificent city of Edinburgh, resting. I needed rest, and I did rest. I did not know anybody. I did not take any letters of introduction at all. I simply rested and enjoyed myself. From my experience with the Scotch everything belonging to them is familiar, the language, the peculiarities of expression, even the technical things that are national, are simply household words with me. I remember when in Edinburgh I was nearly always taken for a Scotchman. Oh, yes! I had my clothes some part colored tartan, and rather enjoyed being taken for a Scotchman. I stuck a big feather in my cap too, and the people would follow me for miles. They thought I was a Highlander, and some ofthe best judges in Scotland said they had never seen a Highland costume like mine. What's more, one of those judges fined me for wearing it--out of mere envy, I suppose. But any man may have a noble, good time in Scotland if they only think he's a native. For breakfast you may have oatmeal poultice-I beg pardon; I mean porridge. Then for dinner you have the fine Scotch game-the blackcock, the spatchcock, the woodcock, the moorcock . I have simply to return my acknowledgments, and to apologize for not being able to make a speech; but give me fair play, and certainly I can make a speech that will astonish anybody, and nobody more than myself. My present position is a national one, if I may be regarded as MARK TWAIN SPEAKING 83 representing the United States ofAmerica. On that side ofthe Atlantic there are 40,000,000 of people. They may be respectable, and I will say in conclusion that I do hope "A brother American" will soon cease to be simply a phrase meaning, but will by and by become a reality, when Great Britain and the citizens of America will be brethren indeed. Text / "Mark Twain as a Scotchman," Lafayette, Indiana, Courier, January 14, 1874.· 20 · After two lecture engagements in Liverpool in January 1874, Mark Twain sailed for home, and this time he remained there for a while. When Charles Kingsley came overfor a lecture tour soon after, Mark Twain was delighted to introduce him to a Salem audience, also to entertain him and his wifefor several days at the Clemens home in Hartford. Livy thought that the visitor was "a most wonderful man," and Mark Twain, too, admired his gentle character, but he was not enthusiastic about Kinglsey's novels. Introducing the Reverend Charles Kingsley Essex Institute, Salem, Massachusetts, ca. February 14,1874 Ladies and gentlemen: I am here to introduce Mr. Charles Kingsley, the lecturer of the evening, and I take occasion to observe than when I wrote the book called Innocents Abroad I thought it was a volume which would bring me at once into intimate relation with the clergy. But I could bring evidence to show that from that day to this, this is the first time that I have ever been called upon to perform this pleasant office ofvouching for a clergyman and give him a good unbiased start before an audience. Now that my opportunity has come at last, I am appointed to introduce a clergyman who needs no introduction to America. ...