-
Chapter Seven: Singings: The First Step to Independence
- Johns Hopkins University Press
- Chapter
- Additional Information
[ Chapter Seven { Singings The First Step to Independence We all count the days till our sixteenth birthday. —A teenager Far More than Songs Although few outsiders ever receive an invitation to an Amish youth singing, those who do may initially wonder what the big attraction is. A typical American teenager would almost certainly be bored attending a similar social activity: sitting on hard wooden benches around long tables for two hours; singing, among other songs, hymns in a language used mainly in church; and having limited spontaneous interaction with their friends. Few outsiders would recognize that this event is fraught with great significance for both the adolescents and their parents. For the first time in their lives, these young people are interacting in a setting that is not predominately adult-centered. When a young person reaches the “right age,” which is sixteen in most settlements, Rumspringa opens the door for youth to shift their focus from family to peers. Donald B. Kraybill has said: “It is the key moment that ritually signals a rite of passage. . . . Youth are betwixt and between home and the church.”1 This shift may explain 156 [ Growing Up Amish { the ambivalent feelings that many Amish parents express as they release their children to the company of their peers. Intuitively and experientially, parents know that singings are much more than either a religious or a social event. They provide the first real testing ground to see if the values espoused by the adult community will be accepted or rejected by their children . Little wonder, then, that both adults and teens take a keen interest in this important tradition. Ever since anyone can remember, a singing has been the communitysanctioned weekly or biweekly event in which the unmarried youth in a church district meet at a member’s house on a Sunday evening to sing mostly German hymns.2 It appears to have been part of Amish culture since their arrival in North America. Although much has been written about Amish worship services, little has been published about Sunday-night singings . One reason is that in many communities, singings are off-limits to observers. Outsiders may be invited to Sunday worship, weddings, and funerals , but few ever attend singings. In some communities, not even Amish adults are welcome. More than any other area of Amish society, singings have been the domain of the young. Having musical talent or enjoying music matters less than socializing with other youth in a setting with minimal adult control. The singings offer increased independence and an arena for developing relationships that will shape the youth for the rest of their lives. This is especially true in male-female relationships. The Doorway to Rumspringa It is not surprising, then, to find that singings are held in virtually all settlements .3 Traditionally, youth attend until they marry—or until they and everyone else conclude that marriage is unlikely (by age thirty), at which time they drop out.4 Nobody apparently knows why sixteen is the magic age to begin going with the young folk. But in most settlements it is a milestone, universally regarded by both adults and youth as a watershed event. It is undoubtedly a more important transition than obtaining one’s driver’s license or graduating from high school in mainstream society, because the change of status for Amish youth is so abrupt. In some settlements, especially the [44.222.113.28] Project MUSE (2024-03-29 07:48 GMT) [ Singings: The First Step to Independence { 157 larger ones, teens move from highly regulated lives to exhilarating or scary freedom, and sometimes surprising excesses, in a single day. Most of them excitedly anticipate their new status, although a few fifteenyear -olds experience some anxiety as their birthday approaches. Now, more than ever, they must establish their standing among their peers of both sexes. Such anxiety occasionally leads some youth to stay home on Sunday evenings instead of immediately joining the group. Referring to his granddaughter , who had recently turned sixteen, an Amish man explained, “Sally is family oriented and hasn’t been exposed to all that excitement.” She concurred , “I’ll miss my brothers and sisters at home.” A fifteen-year-old boy who had not fully matured physically expressed doubts that he would join the youth when he reached his next birthday. In a few settlements, going with the youth happens gradually, and some youth may routinely delay their entry for several weeks or months. “We begin somewhere...