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109 Chapter 9 Affinity Groups Settling with Your Tribe In the 2012 film Quartet, directed by Dustin hoffman, aging musicians live out their last years at Beecham house, a British retirement community set in a mansion on a lovely estate. Strains of violins, pianos, and operatic voices waft through the house and out across the expansive lawns as elders continue to practice their passion for music. The longing to live in community with like-minded souls, the film suggests , runs deep. even as tolerance and respect for diversity are on the rise in our multi-cultural world, many of us gravitate toward living with our “tribe,” however we define that. If you pull back the lens far enough to view the alternatives in this book, they generally reflect a desire to live around people with whom we have a bond, whether it’s our neighbors in the Village, NOrC, or cooperative; our friends or family with whom we share a house; or our cohousing comrades who seek to create an intentional community. although all retirement communities share the bond of same-age peers (if you call a span of thirty years or more the same age), so-called niche or affinity group retirement communities are composed of a subgroup of older people with shared characteristics who want to live near one another. These are purpose-built places for a targeted constituency, whether they be gay and lesbian baby boomers, retired union letter carriers, aging asian-americans, faith-based groups, artists, even recreational vehicle (rV) enthusiasts. Unlike most of the alternative models, these communities are usually created not by the residents themselves but by developers, both nonprofit and entrepreneurs. Some are affordable, others, pricey. Most are solely for independent “active” adults, but a few offer a continuum of health care services. For example, escapees Care Center (Care stands for Continuing assistance for retired escapees) is not a nursing home for run-away convicts, but a nonprofit center for rV enthusiasts who are no longer able to hit the road. according to its website, Care answers the question, “What happens to fulltime rVers when they cannot take care of their own or their spouse’s needs 110 With a Little Help from Our Friends following an illness, injury, surgery, or the progression of a long-term health situation?” The answer: come to Livingston, texas, where they will find a “safe haven ” at affordable prices, staffed by professionals. The goal is to allow people to continue to live in their rVs, in community with others, while getting the help they need. It promises, “The atmosphere at Care is like an rV rally. It is nothing like a nursing home!” Pulling up your rV and taking advantage of such services as meals, transportation, housekeeping, and laundry costs $849 a month in 2012 (plus $36 a day to use the licensed adult day-care services onsite ), compared to the national average for assisted living of $3550 a month.1 a 2010 aarP article noted, “The sense of community is the lifeline of Care. Member donations make up about half of the nonprofit’s operational budget, and volunteers help keep expenses low.” The article tells of one woman who had moved there when her husband was dying of cancer and had found a genuine community who got her through the difficult ordeal. “If I had a bad day and things were rough, there was always someone to listen,” she explained. “They were a tremendous support, and I knew I wasn’t alone. . . . rVers are a breed of their own. They take care of each other. You make lifelong friends.”2 another emerging affinity community is aimed at those who practice Zen meditation. The San Francisco Zen Center hopes to develop a large parcel of land north of the city for a Zen-inspired continuing care retirement community . The idea was initially spawned by the Center’s realization that they did not have enough rooms to house their aging monks, who are promised life-long housing and care after the age of seventy in return for twenty years or more of service to the community. “When we made that promise, we didn’t think about where we’re going to house people,” said Susan O’Connell, president of the Center. “Our community is a very vibrant, ever-changing community —if we fill up all the rooms with a large portion of elders, there won’t be enough room for people coming to train and participate.” according to...

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