Thinking Outside the Girl Box: Teaming Up with Resilient Youth in Appalachia

5. Irene and Virginia: Girls Take the Lead, but “It’s Hard Coming from a Participant to Staff”

 5 GirlsTake the Lead, but “It’s Hard Coming from a Participant to Staff” HUnTed doWn BY sHeLLeY At age seventeen,virginia had that “i don’t know” syndrome so common to young women—one of the most severe cases i’ve ever seen. in one interview, she responded with “i don’t know” fifteen times in the course of a four-page transcript. The interviewer wanted to know how she had changed after five years in the Grp: v i r g i n i a : i don’t know. i really don’t know. i n t e rv i e w e r : You don’t know. Are there, like, any words that come to mind? 96 irene and virginia v i r g i n i a : i was really, really shy. i’m still shy now, but not as shy. i mean, i don’t know. Latervirginia described herself as someone who will “speak her mind,”thanks to the protection of the confidentiality rule in the Grp, as well as someone who “acts crazy . . . to make people laugh”—suggesting that her shyness dissipates when around close friends.With her easygoing, calm demeanor,virginia had a gentle presence and a sweet smile that brought out her dimples. fair-complected irene, with her light hair often pulled back in a ponytail, also described herself as becoming less quiet through the Grp: “Before i was in the program, i was shy. didn’t talk much to anybody, didn’t really want a lot of friends,”she recalled.“‘no use talking to anyone else because nobody cares.’That’s how i felt.” irene is now outgoing and talkative.i remember her as a steady,practical“roll up her sleeves”kind of person. confident without being attention-seeking, irene was more likely to be found taking a group photo than posing for one. Another researcher described irene in field notes as “very matter-of-fact, patient . . . easy to talk to, and not easily ruffled.”virginia—at least around researchers— continued to come across as quiet throughout the years, saying little in focus groups and even in one-on-one interviews. What outspoken irene and reserved virginia have in common is that they both were involved with the Girls’ resiliency program as girl participants for five years and then both became Grp staff members. They were hand-picked and “hunted down” (as irene put it) by shelley to work for her after they dropped out of high school. Both earned Board of education high school diplomas while they were working as staff members . despite the challenges of girl-to-staff transitions, for those who held the positions and for the Grp itself, both irene andvirginia loved working with younger girls in the program. As virginia said, “Working with girls is something . . . i think i’m good at.” Brief WorrYinG inTerLUde staying true to my commitment to be fully present—a genuine participant—in this collaborative project, i am obliged to admit here that Girls Take the Lead 97 i spent a lot of time avoiding drafting this chapter. in the early part of the writing, the stories and ideas flowed easily as i described the program’s unquestionably successful early years. it was easy to connect what the Grp did so well with outside literature and tales of other flourishing organizations. As we start to get into murkier waters in chapters 5 and 6—where the Grp makes tough decisions rife with internal debate, and, in the end, folds—i find myself suddenly interested in everything but this. student e-mails need responses. old articles need to be revised. My office needs to be reorganized. These plants need to be watered, right now. i worry. i avoid. Laurie Thorp, in the final chapter of her ethnography, Pull of the Earth, about an elementary school garden, asked herself: “dare i write about the failures of these teachers i hold so dear?” (2006, 125). dare i write—and from the“outside,”no less—about the failures of the Girls’resiliency program? dare i disagree with decisions or perspectives of shelley, ric,virginia, irene, or other staff and board members who have given so much of their lives to working with girls in Lincoln county? Who have been “on call” twenty-four hours a day for years, just to send the message that someone is always, always here for you? dare i...