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Winner of the Nebraska Book Award for Poetry (2002)

This elegant and moving collection documents Hilda Raz's experience with breast cancer. The journey, from diagnosis to chemotherapy to mastectomy, from denial to humor to grief and rage, is ultimately one of courage and creativity. The poems themselves are accessible and finely wrought. They are equally testaments to Raz's insistence on making an order out of chaos, of finding ways to create and understand and eventually accept new definitions of good and evil, health, blame, personal boundaries — in short, a new sense of self. These poems remain intimately bound to the world and of the senses, becoming documents of transformation.

Table of Contents

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  1. Cover
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  1. Contents
  2. pp. vii-ix
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  1. Prologue
  1. Repair
  2. p. 3
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  1. Narrative Without People
  2. p. 4
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  1. Let's consider the consequences
  2. pp. 5-6
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  1. Isaac Stern's Performance
  2. p. 7
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  1. I
  1. I Hear the Name of the Moon and Am Afraid
  2. p. 11
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  1. Weathering/boundaries/what is good
  2. pp. 12-13
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  1. To Explain
  2. p. 14
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  1. Mu
  2. p. 15
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  1. Coming Down with Something
  2. p. 16
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  1. Fish—Belly—Mound
  2. p. 17
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  1. "Two Are Better Than One"
  2. p. 18
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  1. Getting Well
  2. p. 19
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  1. For Barbara, Who Brings a Green Stone in the Shape of aTriangle
  2. pp. 20-21
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  1. Day-Old Bargain
  2. pp. 22-23
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  1. Breast/fever
  2. pp. 24-25
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  1. II
  1. Sarah's Response
  2. p. 29
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  1. Sarah Among Animals
  2. p. 30
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  1. Sarah's Head
  2. p. 31
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  1. Sarah Fledging
  2. p. 32
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  1. Sarah's Waltz
  2. pp. 33-34
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  1. Balance
  2. pp. 35-36
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  1. Order
  2. p. 37
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  1. Axe-earrings, abalone shell
  2. p. 38
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  1. Birth
  2. pp. 39-40
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  1. III
  1. Opening/Working/Walking
  2. p. 43
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  1. Hey You
  2. p. 44
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  1. Grieving, she hits the red fox
  2. p. 45
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  1. Mapping/Bleating
  2. pp. 46-47
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  1. Trope
  2. pp. 48-49
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  1. Sow Sister
  2. p. 50
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  1. Bernini's Ribbon
  2. p. 51
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  1. Petting the Scar
  2. pp. 52-53
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  1. Teaching, Hurt
  2. pp. 54-55
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  1. Riddle
  2. pp. 56-57
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  1. IV
  1. Chigger Socks
  2. p. 61
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  1. Daylight Savings: Sandy Creek, Nebraska
  2. pp. 62-63
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  1. Cobb's Hill Pond
  2. pp. 64-65
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  1. Fuss
  2. pp. 66-67
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  1. Zen: the one I love most holds my tongue
  2. p. 68
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  1. Camarada
  2. pp. 69-70
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  1. From Your Mouth to God's Ear
  2. p. 71
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  1. "We don't deserve what we get"
  2. p. 72
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  1. G: But it's still not all right with you?
  2. p. 73
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  1. Mutation Blues
  2. p. 74
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  1. Insomnia Again
  2. pp. 75-76
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  1. Service
  2. pp. 77-79
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  1. V
  1. Hot
  2. p. 83
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  1. Dying
  2. p. 84
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  1. Terror: A Riddle
  2. p. 85
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  1. Nuts
  2. p. 86
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  1. Lincoln, Nebraska
  2. p. 87
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  1. Letter of Transmittal
  2. p. 88
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  1. Now
  2. p. 89
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  1. Who Does She Think She Is
  2. p. 90
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  1. Earlier
  2. p. 91
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  1. Vowels
  2. pp. 92-93
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  1. Epilogue
  1. Gloxinia/Flicker/Oxalis
  2. pp. 97-98
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  1. Recovery
  2. p. 99
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  1. My Award/The Jews of Lukow
  2. pp. 100-103
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  1. Ecstasies
  2. pp. 104-105
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  1. Acknowledgments
  2. p. 107
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