Year of the Pig

18. Saw Palmetto

18 saw Palmetto At the core of this idea [ecosystem management] is the belief that the best forest management maintains the full diversity of an ecosystem’s organisms—trees, grasses, herbs, fungi, wildlife—as well as their multiple and complex interconnections. —Lawrence S. Earley, Looking for Longleaf, 2004 Saw palmetto (Serenoa repens): A more abrasive, aggressive, and flammable version of the blue palm—Sabal minor. Fires get out of hand quickly in saw palmetto. In the late 1990s, the USDA–Forest Service went to great expense installing a huge Fire and Fire Surrogate Project at multiple locations across the United States. One study site was at the Solon Dixon Center, where we have a bluestem understory. Another study site was at Myakka River State Park in Florida, where they have a saw palmetto understory. At the Dixon Center, our burns went as planned. At Myakka, a small prescribed burn quickly became a large uncontrolled burn, and much of the project at that location went up in smoke. Florida, the land of broken hearts and dissipating dreams. This state had punished me with ten consecutive strikeouts. It was well into December , and if I wanted a kill in ten states, it was time to bring back some pork-filled coolers from the Sunshine State. Back in the spring, a search on eBay for “hog hunt” had turned up an airboat hunt in south Florida that seemed pretty cool. Even so, I passed it up, looking 176 cHaPter 18 for closer and cheaper hunts. After ten north Florida hunts without seeing a single pig, it was time for a south Florida airboat hog hunt. It had been several months since this seller had listed his airboat hunt on eBay. Luckily, I had saved his contact information, just in case my other Florida hunts didn’t pan out. Which they certainly had not. The seller’s name was listed as David Watson. I called the number from the eBay listing and explained the reason for my call. “I saved your information from an earlier listing on eBay. I would like to book a hog hunt if you are still guiding.” David said he could take me the following weekend. It was perfect timing. After I explained my quest and writing project, David surprised me by extending an invitation for me to stay over at his place, so we could get an early start on Sunday morning. What was needed for an airboat hunt? David suggested knee-high boots or, “Really, your ideal footwear is tennis shoes if we enter deeper water. If you’re going to get wet you might as well be comfortable, and wet tennis shoes are a lot easier to walk in than wet boots.” I knew exactly what he was talking about. I used to noodle (fish by hand) and work nets in lakes and creeks where there were numerous hazards to bare feet. Tennis shoes were standard wear on those water adventures. David’s airboat hog hunt cost $300. My wallet already held a Florida nonresident hunting license, so no additional money there. But the drive was going to be another doozy. MapQuest said Mims, Florida, was five hundred miles from Andalusia, Alabama. But an airboat ride would be an exiting new adventure, and if it delivered a pig, all my travails in Florida would prove worthwhile investments on the way to the final payoff. The Solon Dixon Center still had me in its clutches at 6:00 p.m. on Friday, December 7. I was wrapping up loose ends before my weekend airboat hunt when an e-mail popped up. It was “Supermee,” another eBay seller from Florida whom I had previously contacted about hog hunts in south Florida. Supermee also had a hunt available for the upcoming weekend! Considering my record of extreme bad luck in Florida, was this some sort of sign? It was pretty unusual for me to be sitting in the office at 6:00 on a Friday evening. Would Supermee help me break the Florida drought? Supermee’s phone number was in the body saw PalMetto 177 of the e-mail so I called him. I told Diego—his real name—about my Sunday hunt in south Florida, and he encouraged me to come on down. “No problem. I can take you hunting in the morning.” It would be challenging to travel so far down the peninsula on such short...