Words, Not Swords: Iranian Women Writers and the Freedom of Movement

Epilogue: Words as Ambassadors of Peace and Beacons of Hope

235 Epilogue Words as Ambassadors of Peace and Beacons of Hope Remember, O sword, You are the younger brother, the latter-born Your triumph, however exultant, Must one day be over, In the beginning was the word. —Hilda Doolittle, “The Walls Do Not Fall” Let me add only that stereotypes are easier to shrug off if yours is not the culture being stereotyped; or, at the very least, if your culture has the power to counterpunch against the stereotype. —Salman Rushdie, “Outside the Whale” Kill a Cat, Tame the Shrew There is a well-known Iranian proverb that recommends, “Kill a cat in the nuptial chamber.” Why murder and mayhem in a space of love and romance? I pondered for years. How is the slaying of a cat related to wedding rituals? I wanted to know. Why bloodshed at the threshold of matrimony? I knew the message of violence in this adage, even if targeted at a cat, was justified as a necessary form of intervention, a piece of advice to the newlyweds. But, then, what kind of a heterosexual relationship did the proverb condone by normalizing carnage and bloodshed? To whom was it addressed anyway? Was it directed to the bride or to the groom? What kind of a social order did it perpetuate? In a culture that values proverbs and believes them to be the condensed wisdom and experience of generations of revered forefathers and foremothers, what was the lesson implied in this old axiom? 236 • WO R DS , N OT S WO R DS Like most Iranian proverbs, this one, too, has a story behind it. It is said that a certain shrew of a woman known for her aggressive nonconformity had driven away all potential suitors in spite of her wealth and beauty. She was disobedient , headstrong, and ill tempered; she had a long, sharp, nagging, and scolding tongue; she had a stormy nature and a domineering disposition. No one wanted to suffer her bed, let alone her companionship. She was a saliteh, the Persian equivalent of a “shrew,” and who wants to marry a saliteh? Well, perhaps only a bully. For, eventually, a man known to be a tyrant became increasingly intrigued by the challenge as well as the financial gains of marrying this woman. He volunteered to tie the knot with her in spite of all the warnings of family, friends, and well-wishers. He assured everyone that he knew exactly what he was doing and arranged for a cat to be taken to his nuptial chamber. After the wedding ceremony was over, and as soon as the newlyweds were alone in their bedroom, the groom looked in the direction of the cat and said, “Go fetch me a glass of water.” The unsuspecting animal meowed in blissful ignorance. He added threat to his request. “Did you not hear me?” he said in a raised voice. “I told you to go get me a glass of water.” The defiant cat flicked her tail but did not budge, so the clearly annoyed alpha man took out his dagger and without any hesitation beheaded the heedless creature. Undisturbed by his unprovoked violent act, holding the bloodied weapon in his hand with great pride, intoxicated by his unmitigated power, the groomturned -executioner looked at the terrified and speechless bride and repeated his command with a shrill note in his euphoric voice. “I want a glass of water,” he said triumphantly. In a calculated manipulation of her ears and fears, showing no sign of remorse, never raising his hands to her, he had exerted his superiority and established her subjugation. He wanted to instill fear through the spectacle of a pitiless killing. And he succeeded. He had the wherewithal to acquire power and had thus earned the right to be obeyed. Trapped in an enclosed space with a remorseless murderer, fearing for her life, the startled bride succumbed to her husband’s taming machinations. She promptly delivered a glass of water. And thus the pattern was set. Forced into submission, the shrewish woman metamorphosed into a gentle and submissive wife. She had no option—at least, not for now. The groom had established his masculine authority right from the start. Female recalcitrance was bent into submission, male supremacy recognized, and marital “harmony” assured in this household. Blessed be the Lord. EPI LO GU E • 237 What earlier seemed like an extreme folly soon became the envy...