Zora Neale Hurston: Collected Plays

Lenox Avenue

Lenox Avenue cast: Officer Young Man Man 1 Woman 1 Preacher Preacher’s Followers, a man and two women Girl Man 2 Man 3 Man 4 Man 5 Lois Various Street People Time: Present. Place: New York City. Scene: Lenox Avenue at 135th Street. Setting: Backdrop showing intersection and houses. The autos are on a scenic band22 and keep whizzing past. Action: When the curtain rises (children’s game insert)23 there is a traf- fic officer at the intersection. A very effeminate young man enters left with a large cretonne sewing bag on his wrist. Officer glares at him a moment, then yells at him. Officer: Come here. Young Man: (Looks all about himself) Are you speaking to me? Officer: Who else but you? Make it snappy! (Young man approaches center of intersection where Officer is standing.) What you got in that bag? Young Man: My knitting. Officer: (Scornfully) Oh yeah? And where are you going with your knitting? Young Man: To the army. Officer: (Surprised) To the army? Say! What are you going to the army for? 100 050 cold (75-130) 4/9/08 11:03 AM Page 100 Young Man: Oh well, the boys must have their socks, you know. (Waves a fluffy goodbye.) Toodle-oo, old cabbage, I must try to get the boys out of the trenches before Christmas. (He exits right. Officer glares after him. Enter right, a man and woman nearing middle age. They are angry. He is walking a little ahead of her and pauses to talk back at her.) Man 1: Aw, go bag yo’ head, woman! You ain’t got nothin’ to do wid me. It’s none of yo’ business where I been. Woman 1: (Catching up to him) I’m yo’ wife, ain’t I? I reckon I got something to say ’bout you bugabooing ’round town all night. Man 1: Aw, naw you ain’t. God gives every man a lovable chance, and if he don’t take it—that’s his hard luck. But I’m telling you straight, the world ain’t gointer owe me nothin’ but a hole in de ground when I die. (She glares at him, arms akimbo. He starts to walk.) Woman 1:You big old evil mule you!You so evil till one drop of yo’spit would poison all the fish in the ocean. Hold on, I ain’t through wid you yet! Man 1:You might as well be through. I’m through wid you. I got a brand new costume that you don’t fit.I’m playin’a brand new game and you ain’t it. Bye-bye, mama, you can’t snore in my ear no more. Woman 1: (Slurringly) Don’t put dat lie out, papa.You ain’t near through wid me! Man 1: Woman, I’m just too through. You gimme the close up cramps every time I look at you. Woman 1: (Snapping her fingers) Brother,don’t hang dat nasty wash out in my back yard.You ain’t through wid me and I know it. Man 1: Aw yeah. I don’t keer if I never see you no more. That would be soon aplenty. Woman 1: (Gets right up in his face) You might as well stop dat wringing and twisting, ’cause I know you want me some ’gin (again), ’cause I’m a damn sweet woman and you know it. Man 1:(He looks her in the eye for a moment,then grabs her by the arm and faces her about.) Aw, come on and let’s go home, woman. I hates to hear folks fussin’ on the streets. (They exit right. Enter a street preacher with two sisters and a brother. The preacher has a pair of cymbals and a bag. The sisters carry tambourines. The brother has a soap box. He places the box on the curb and the quartet lenox avenue • 101 050 cold (75-130) 4/9/08 11:03 AM Page 101 sings a song, “Wouldn’t Mind Dying if Dying Was All.” After this the preacher mounts the box and speaks. A crowd collects.) Preacher:You folks ain’t right.You needs to be born agin. Now I see some of y’all askin’, “How kin a man enter de second time into his mother’s esophagus and be...