Patricia Neal: An Unquiet Life

19. Tragedy

227 19 Tragedy Her life was like a great wave Breaking in the lonely sea: Oh, the wonder, the magic and the loss. —Thomas Wolfe Patricia and Roald grieved deeply for their first child. Roald cried continually after he returned from the hospital. The loss of Olivia was something from which he would never recover. That night at Gipsy House, Patricia sat by the window until dawn, quietly staring into the dark. Her memoirs describe the struggle the family endured those first days, weeks, and months after losing Olivia. Eura Neal said that she would come right over, but Patricia told her it was unnecessary, that things would be all right. Sonia Austrian remembered that she and her husband were hosting a dinner party late at night when actress Mary Fickett, at Patricia’s request, called with the news of Olivia’s death. Fickett also contacted Harvey and Gisella Orkin and Ed and Marian Goodman. Austrian was prepared to fly over with her girls. Susie and Tessa were the best of friends, and Tessa had never even spent a night alone in a room in her short life. However, Susie, too, came down with the measles and plans were put on hold. Dahl’s sisters handled the funeral arrangements—the music, the flowers, the casket. They refused to allow Patricia to see her child in death. The funeral was held midday the following Tuesday at the Little Missenden Church, a short drive from Great Missenden. This was the same church where Olivia had been baptized. The coffin was closed, and for years Patricia regretted not having been able to see Olivia’s face just once more. The Rev. S. F. C. Roberts led the service, which was attended by family and such friends as Frankie Conquy, Helen Horton and her husband Hamish, Leslie O’Malley, and Wally Saunders. Facing page: Patricia Neal, circa 1962. From the author’s collection. Shearer฀book.indb฀฀฀227 3/16/2006฀฀฀12:16:44฀PM 228 Patricia Neal: An Unquiet Life “The service was peaceful and short,” wrote Roald’s sister Alfhild from her home, Old Farm in Aylesbury, to Patricia’s mother, Eura, on November 28. “And no-one went to the gravesite (later) . . . but Pat and Roald went down to the churchyard in the late afternoon. . . . Roald and Pat have been quite wonderful—they try to carry on quite normally—seeing friends, telephoning and playing with the children. . . . Pat is able to cry and talk about Olivia, which helps her.”1 Frankie Conquy recalled the day in 1960 when she first met Patricia, who had appeared at the Godstowe schoolyard at High Wycomb to pick up Olivia . Conquy’s daughter Sarah also attended the school, and Conquy always remembered how beautiful Patricia was that day and how good she was with the five-year-old Olivia. “Olivia was so talented. She would make up rhymes, and songs. And she would draw little pictures,” Conquy said.2 Within days of Olivia’s death, Roald called Conquy, insisting, “Now look, you’ve got to get your child gamma globulin.” Frankie replied, “I don’t think it’s possible.” “Of course it’s possible!” said Dahl. “I’ll ring my doctor to see if I can get any,” she responded. “I’ll ring your doctor and I’ll get it!” concluded Roald.3 And he did, though Roald never told his friend how. The family pulled together remarkably during those first few difficult days. Patricia put Olivia’s belongings away in an African trunk Roald had brought home from his travels, and Patricia’s mother-in-law, Mormor, comforted her by telling her that she would survive this. The older woman had lost her own firstborn to appendicitis, and Harald Dahl had died just six weeks later, possibly from a broken heart over the loss of his child. The swiftness of Olivia’s death shattered Roald, and his mourning took on a grand scale. To help him cope with his grief, he tended Olivia’s grave. Around the site, Roald and Valerie Finnis planted an extensive garden with rare and exotic species. He and Patricia selected literally hundreds of plants, the names of some of which Olivia had known. Dahl would spend months collecting rocks and porcelain animals, which Patricia helped him place. Patricia purchased the headstone for the child’s grave. Engraved on it were the words, “She stands before us a living child.” Roald couldn’t handle looking at it and had...