Tales from Kentucky Lawyers

8. Blunders

8 BLUNDERS Legal professionals do the same thing day after day, much like persons who work in machine shops; thus, because courtroom proceedings are routine, judges and lawyers rarely commit blunders in court. However, those professionals who have never previously served as a judge, defense lawyer, or prosecutor often make errors, some ofwhich are downright humorous to those witnessing them. As the following stories show, even seasoned courtroom participants occasionally commit laughable mistakes. 102. "OOPS, THE JUDGE BLUNDERS IN COURT" Judge Winn was a pretty rough acting fellow. He was a pretty good judge, but he could be kind of rough, too. We were over here in court, and there had been a fellow that came two or three days before that from Campton. He was a crippled fellow, named Roberts, in a wheelchair . He had some kind of case and was back the second time. Judge Winn knew who he was but he couldn't place a name on him. Well, I was up at the bench conducting business with him, and the judge asked me, "Who's the old gentleman in the wheelchair?" I said, "That's Mr. Roberts from Campton." So the judge kind of nodded his head, and I said, "But don't get him mixed up with Ironsides on television." When I said that, I started back to my seat. About that time, I heard Judge Winn say, "Mr. Ironsides-er, I mean Mr. Roberts." Several other lawyers were huddled at the end of the bench and BLUNDERS 87 they turned around and looked, and finally they realized or understood what had happened. The court reporter, who was a good friend ofmine, and who traveled around with the judge, accused me of setting him up! OldJudge Winn recovered prettyquickly though, and I don't think the old crippled man ever realized what the judge had said. He just wheeled his chair up there and took care of his business. Asa R. Little Jr., Frenchburg, November 26, 2001 103. "LAWYERS OVERCOME JUDGE'S DECISION" I have practiced law since 1948, and in my long career, I guess on more than one occasion I should have been sent to jail for contempt of court because of the things that I might say to a judge to try to block his way of thinking or his ruling. I recall a specific case many years ago when I was county attorney. J. Douglas Graham was the commonwealth attorney. The Lion's Club at Clay City had a drawing. They were giving away a car and a rifle. There was a man from Winchester whose last name was Reed, and he was the announcer down at the racetrack. So what they did, they had this little girl about ten or twelve years old go over and reach her hand in a drum and take out a ticket, and take it across the stage to this track announcer, who then read the name and the number. Well, by George, when he read the name and the number, it was his daughter. Well, the Lion's Club got to thinking about it, and they said that there's something rotten about this. So, they started looking into it, and refused to give Reed's daughter the car because they said that he had switched the tickets-that he palmed the ticket of his daughter and read it instead ofthe one that the little girl took to him. So they refused to give the car to her. The track announcer and his daughter sued the Lion's Club. J. Douglas Graham and I were representing the Lion's Club. And this track announcer [Reed] came in with a bunch of witnesses. At the close of his testimony, Judge Irvin Turner said, "I've heard all the evidence I want to hear, and I'm going to award this car to the plaintiff." Well, I hit the floor and said, "Judge, are you not going to hear our side at all?" He said, "No. I've decided that I'm going to enter a judgment for the plaintiff." 88 Tales from Kentucky Lawyers And I said, "Judge, do you realize that you're entering a judgment on false and perjured testimony? Do you realize that that's what you are doing?" Well, ofcourse, he kind ofhit the ceiling, and he told the foreman of the grand jury, who was an old man...