Dawnland Voices: An Anthology of Indigenous Writing from New England

Nick Bear

264 Nick Bear (b. 1985) A proud father of three girls, Nick Bear has been involved in writing, acting, and performing for many years. He grew up on Indian Island but identifies with all four of the Maine Wabanaki nations. Of his poetry, he writes, “I like to create images with my writing that showcase my heritage and the things it has taught me, or imagine through my writing the things I can show others. To keep my people living well and strong for our future generations is one of the biggest reasons for doing what I do because I feel that I have the voice and ability to do my ancestors justice.” These are Nick Bear’s first published poems. Dry Funk Angry at the world, thirsty for juice I can’t have Alcoholic one word that makes me feel like getting trashed Family don’t help and if they did I’d know it In my face from all sides those sons of bitches would throw it I’m not pissed at them I’m just pissed with friends Who don’t give a shit about me or them selves So they’ll drink to the end Of every bottle god damn I miss that the most Tipping up a jug seeing who could chug till its ghost Saying fuck it and fuck you fuck life and fuck who Ever got in my way and wanted to fuck too My mouth is filthy from all the drink it’s sipped on Liquor in my bloodstream so even when I’m dead It lives on Can’t deny myself this one true affliction Fuck that wack clothing line, son I’m talking about addiction When you sweat just thinking where your next drop is coming from Heaven forbid if you got a job with a kid and another one On the way I’m numb from the sway and can’t find a day Nick Bear 265 Whiskey calling my name singing me old songs I loved to play Your guts wrench up and you don’t need a reason anymore Just the fact that it’s there and what are you waiting for Tapping you like come get it I’m rapping just to forget it Booze will never beat this Indian cuz I’m a never let it gladly Put your heart in the sky let it fly and sing sweet songs like a lullaby Arms open life is water gotta jump in to feel it The way it was meant to be felt Knelt mind body and spirit Collect the puddle that had no choice but to melt Don’t fear it Embrace that Misplaced and in fact noble strength Still looks good with a crack Still would if she could take me back Be still until we can shatter that looking glass Fuck this happened fast What’s great is it woke me up at last Spoke up and yelled “it’s me your future—ready to walk up my path?” Is what it asked Loud and clear—I’m now; you’re so last year How bout a bow cuz this is my stage dear Ate slayed deer last night with my hands Need that connection animalistic You’re sand To my waves calm and cool with sunny rays Some of these days feel like eternity Laugh as I see nobody who is worse than me You’s a nursery I’m a hurting unit Working on me is letting go of all the stupid Worthless no function but destruction type things That threw my ass like a swing set 266 penobscot Us just rings In my head like Indian songs that touch your skin It’s like there’s roots in my Tims, branches off my brim Growing faster by the moment Living right strike me like a god damn sin So I own it Treaty of 2010 Just signed an Act and now it’s in effect Cut all ties with the United Stolen States of Death As a general, I rule—you’re no longer welcome to our grounds Which means removal of all life that don’t come from something brown Load up your boats gather the multiple herds Leave behind the memories—we laugh as they all burn Authority isn’t a value that you need to leave us Sovereign as a unit fuck your God In...