Gang of One: Memoirs of a Red Guard

20. "The Goal: Join the Party!"

 ‘‘The Goal: Join the Party’’ To keep my mind from thoughts of Bean Sprout and the terrible dreams, I studied even harder, spending all my spare time on books. I made good progress when I completed my apprenticeship at the end of the third year: I had mastered high school mathematics and physics and had even gone on to study calculus and differential equations. But still I did not know how I would ever use the theoretical knowledge I acquired. Nor did I have any idea how Newton’s laws and differential equations would help me escape the dreaded factory and get me into college. As far as I could see, thirty years from now I would still be working at the testing bay and hearing the roaring engines if I did not find another way out. A few weeks after Bean Sprout’s funeral, I received two letters that suddenly pointed a way out for me. The first letter was from Smoking Devil, from whom I had not heard for more than a year. After talking happily about his two girls and his wife, he revealed his strategy to better himself in the communist society. ‘‘You will be surprised to hear this,’’ he wrote. ‘‘I have just joined the Communist Party! I have figured out that joining the Party is the best way to advance in one’s career in China. . . . Have you thought of joining the Party? You should.’’ The second letter was from Baby Dragon, my fellow Red Guard of the Great Wall Fighting Team, who had joined the army. Strangely, in his letter he took the same attitude as Smoking Devil toward joining the Party. After four years in the service, Baby Dragon had advanced significantly in his career. He, too, had joined the Communist Party and had risen to the rank of an officer. Because of his Party membership, he had been chosen to be among the first ‘‘new students’’ to enroll in the army’s Infantry College, which had just been reopened together with many civilian colleges as part of the Communist Party’s new educational reform. The ‘‘new reform’’ mandated that all colleges must recruit students based on their political loyalty to the Party. Both Smoking Devil and Baby Dragon were right, I thought. Party ‘‘The Goal: Join the Party’’  membership was a way for me to fulfill my dreams of going to college and escaping the factory. Not long after I received these letters, the East Wind Aircraft Factory announced that it too would soon select a few Party members to study at Nanjing College of Aeronautics. It was a chance I could not afford to miss. ‘‘A sacrifice I must make—THE GOAL: JOIN THE PARTY’’—I entered the elliptic command in my secret diary, which I had been keeping for some time. I used only elliptical phrases and cryptic symbols to remind myself of my decisions. The decision meant that I would have to sacrifice my academic studies and to devote my time to political activities , activities that I had always loathed. I hated those vulgar and hypocritical Communist Party officials, but I now must work to win their favor , just as I had with Uncle Cricket. As with my studies, I devised a plan and immediately began to execute the plan. As a first step in my campaign to join the Party, I started a second diary , an ‘‘open’’ diary that I would deliberately leave in places where it would be easily discovered. It was full of revolutionary thoughts and praise for the Party. Years of exposure to communist propaganda made writing such a diary much easier than working out calculus problems. Before long, I filled three volumes, which I was careful to wrap with bright red plastic covers. I was also careful to leave my bright Red diaries carelessly—but not too carelessly—on my office desk and on my bed, and I noticed that Master Deng occasionally glanced at them. Not long after I planted my diaries in strategic places, Master Deng took me aside during a lunch break. ‘‘We are impressed by the thoughts expressed in your diaries,’’ he said, unabashedly admitting that he had read them. ‘‘The Party needs young people like you, people who have both technical skills and a Red heart.’’ He took a long sip from his large teacup, letting the water roll around in his mouth noisily from side to side, and sighed with happiness...