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Positive Conflict Management

John Michael Haynes, Gretchen L. Haynes, Larry Sun Fong

Publication Year: 2004

This mediation how-to manual brings together the collective wisdom of two of the field’s most renowned founders, John Michael Haynes and Larry Sun Fong. The book not only covers a range of mediation cases, but also uniquely provides feedback from the clients as they reflect on the sessions and report on what worked best for them. Beginning with a review of the theoretical underpinnings of the Haynes model of mediation, the book then presents six case studies with each demonstrating one or more of the organizing principles of mediation. The sessions examined reflect the different mediation areas currently being practiced—business, employment, neighborhood, adoption, education, and family. The book goes beyond simply reporting what mediators experience as it shares the insights and motivations of Fong and Haynes. This well-rounded approach includes the exploration of the clients’ thoughts, helping readers to incorporate successful organizing principles into their own mediation practices.

Published by: State University of New York Press

Series: SUNY series in Transpersonal and Humanistic Psychology

Title Page, Copyright, Dedication

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pp. vii-viii

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Foreword. The Mediator Prepares: The Practice of Theory

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pp. ix-xiv

Few who had the opportunity to observe John Haynes mediate disputes would deny his artistry. His elegant presence, accented by bow tie and the British accent, and supported by subtle hand motions, were suggestive of a shaman drawing out evil spirits. For many people in the throes of conflict, his reassuring demeanor elicited a calming effect. ...

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pp. xv-xviii

This book has been a long time in the making, with many diversions along the way and ultimately the death of the principle author, John Haynes. The two remaining authors have completed the work, relying on our many conversations with him, an intimate knowledge of how John worked, and how he thought about the problems of mediation. ...

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1. Principles of Broad-Based Mediation Practice

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pp. 1-22

This book allows the reader to watch mediators at work. It is designed to ensure that mediator trainers, those who conduct mediation, or those new to the field of mediation can, with relative ease, envision two well-known mediators. It allows the readers to have insight into what was going on the minds of John Haynes and Larry Fong during their mediation sessions. ...

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2. The Business of Bagels: Mediating a Business Partnership Dispute

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pp. 23-68

Whenever the mediator enters a partnership business dispute, it is useful to keep in mind that the business is the goose that lays the golden egg. I introduce this concept early into the negotiations to anchor the participants in the reality that they should do nothing that endangers the profitability of the business. I use just that phrase in this case, a dispute involving two partners over whether to make a major investment to mechanize the production line. ...

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3. Sexual Harassment: Mediating an Employment Issue

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pp. 69-106

Sexual harassment cases are generally employment related. Other employment issues include racial and ethnic discrimination; hazing; gay discrimination; and general equal payment, opportunity, and promotion cases. Less than 11 percent of the working population is unionized in the United States, so employers are forced to turn to other formal structures to settle interemployee disputes and ...

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4. Neighbors Defending Their Children

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pp. 107-128

One objective of any mediation is to keep the conversation going.When talking and reasoning with one another stops, then serious difficulties such as impulsive responses or even physical altercations may arise. In this mediation, particular problems arise around the issue of loyalties of parents to their own children, yet being able as adults to model appropriate behaviors to their children. Prior to mediation, the parents became overinvolved and their discussions increased hostilities to the point that the fathers ...

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5. Working with Families: A Parent-Teen Conflict

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pp. 129-168

The next case revisits the McDougal family, this time with Joe as the focus. John Haynes is the mediator and, as with many cases, does not know the details of the previous session with Larry Fong. As you study the transcript, put aside any judgments you may have reached about Joe’s relationship to his family. ...

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6. Adoption: The Chaos of Choice

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pp. 169-200

Most family mediations involve parents or guardians who are involved legally and emotionally. In all likelihood they are doing their psychological best when things are psychologically the worst. Mediation in family conflict is utilized in these most intimate conflicts because of the importance of sustaining long-term and valuable relationships. Likewise, mediation in family conflicts includes the fullest range of all emotions. ...

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7. Teacher-Parent Conflict: A Dispute Over the Classroom

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pp. 201-248

In mediation there are two threads: the problem presented for mediation and the way the parties talk about the problem. The latter is often the major source of the conflict. In my observations, the closer the relationship in most, but not all cases, the more likely it is that participants will fight more about how to talk about the problem than about the problem itself. ...

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pp. 249-260

The authors were fortunate.When they held the taping sessions, the participants agreed to be interviewed following each session. The interviews articulated the participants’ immediate insight about the dynamics of the mediation. We can learn from what points stood out in their minds what they think made an impact on their subsequent behavior. Thus we have not only a verbatim transcript of the mediation session, and the mediator’s comments on what was going on for each of them, but ...

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Vienna Speech: Support for Human and Social Growth

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pp. 261-270

The program ahead of us is packed with workshops and seminars that focus on skills and process.We will be able to learn new techniques, skills, and ideas about mediation. So, it seems to me that the keynote should look at our role as mediators from a different angle. Rather than talk about new skills and techniques as mediators, ...


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pp. 271-274

Brief Biography

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pp. 275-276


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pp. 277-280

E-ISBN-13: 9780791485743
Print-ISBN-13: 9780791459515
Print-ISBN-10: 0791459519

Page Count: 298
Publication Year: 2004

Series Title: SUNY series in Transpersonal and Humanistic Psychology