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3. A Continuum of Violence, 1990-2000
- University of Wisconsin Press
- Chapter
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76 3 A Con tin uum of Vi o lence, 1990–2000 I wanted to go to in gando [re ed u ca tion camp] but was told I couldn’t be cause I was a Twa in 1994. [The of fi cial] said, “You don’t need re ed u ca tion be cause you are not part of the gen o cide. Your peo ple did not kill or get killed.” I was so angry with him. I lost my [Twa] mother and sis ter, and I even hid some Tutsi in my home. I asked my wife to go out dur ing the kill ing and get food for us. I couldn’t go my self. I was too scared. But I knew they wouldn’t even look at an old Twa woman. Those Tutsi we saved don’t even speak to me when they see me now. And I saved their lives! As soon as he [the of fi cial] said that [I don’t need re ed u ca tion], I slammed my fist on the table like this [ ges tures]. He looked at me, and I knew I had done a wrong thing. He called some peo ple, and I spent the next week in prison. Now I just keep to my self and try not to cause any trou ble. (Inter view with Théogène, a des ti tute Twa man, 2006) Be fore 1994, I felt proud to be Rwan dan. Then there was gen o cide, and now the new govern ment shames us by say ing that we [Hutu] did that. Some of us did. I killed, too. I killed my Tutsi neigh bor be cause we ran when the events started, and we soon under stood that only his kind [Tutsi] were get ting killed. He said to me over there [ points to the lo ca tion], “If the Inter ahamwe comes, kill me so I can die with re spect. I don’t want to be thrown away. You can kill me and bury me on my land so my an ces tors will know me.” He said this! Im a gine how I felt! But I also under stood be cause it was a very dif fi cult time for us. Our [com mu nity] was un set tled. Homes were being burned, cows were slaugh tered, and many of our women got A Continuum of Violence, 1990–2000 77 vi o lenced [raped], al though those women don’t talk about it, I saw it my self. So when the time came to kill my friend, I did. That is the only Tutsi I killed. For the rest, I just went along in the group. I joined some of the kill ers so they would think that I sup ported them. So even tu ally my govern ment lost, and the Tutsi one came in. I fear a lot now be cause I know how they [the govern ment] hate Hutu. (Inter view with Fél i cien, an im pris oned Hutu man, 2006) Dur ing the gen o cide, you can not im a gine how it was. My father was an in tel lec tual and taught at the uni ver sity. He was amongst the first to be killed when the Inter ahamwe and the other kill ers got to Bu tare. My mother died with him, as did my three sis ters and my young brother. They killed them all at the home I grew up in. My father told us when things started in Ki gali that the gen o cide would not reach here [Bu tare] be cause of the good re la tions between Hutu and Tutsi. But he under es ti mated his col leagues; his Hutu col leagues killed my fam ily. My other brother got killed at a road block not far from here. I was alone after that; I am the only sur vi vor in my [im me di ate] fam ily. The one that killed my brother was a fa mous Hutu—very pow er ful since he owned land and had many peo ple work ing for him. But be fore things hap pened [the gen o cide] he was known to be a mod er ate.1 My father was his friend, and he and his wife used to visit us at least once a month. All this and...
