Lawfully Wedded Husband
How My Gay Marriage Will Save the American Family
Publication Year: 2013
Published by: University of Wisconsin Press
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Title Page, Copyright, Dedication
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What are you guys wear ing to mor row?” asked the as sist ant di rec tor of Girls Who Like Boys Who Like Boys, the re al ity “I’m wear ing jeans and a nice vest,” I said, “and Mike will be There was a brief si lence on the other end of the line. “Joel,” the as sist ant di rec tor said, “this Iowa wed ding is the cul mi na tion “If you’re not dressed up, peo ple will think you’re not tak ing ...
1. Saying Yes
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I bought more or na ments for the Christ mas tree!” Mike called as he closed the front door be hind him.tree,” I said, not look ing up from Per sua sion. Louisa was about to get her con cus sion, and I’d be damned if I was going to inter rupt the story now just be cause my boy friend had passed a store with “I know, but these were so fab u lous I couldn’t help my self. ...
2. Researching Family Marriage Traditions
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In the mean time, while I fig ured out a way to apol o gize to my fam ily in Los An geles, I fig ured I ought to get Mike an en-gage ment ring, if only so that if he went to a bar he would now be forced to ex pend a mod i cum of ef fort to ap pear avail able, though since his bar vis its co in cide with the ap pear ances of Halley’s Comet I didn’t have much to worry about. The prob lem was that ...
3. Deciding on Living Arrangements
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We en vi sion our cer e mony,” I read, “as being—”“Te di ous,” Mike of fered.I glow ered at him. “We en vi sion our cer e mony as being—”“Sweet heart, this is the third ques tion on the first page of the book. If you won’t even let me fin ish ask ing it, how are we ever It was early June of 2008; I was still in the dog house with the ...
4. Dealing with the Legal Business
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The first same-sexers to wed in Cal i for nia after the state Su preme Court’s de ci sion in favor of mar riage equal ity, I under stand, were Del Mar tin and Phyl lis Lyon, ac ti vists who had been to gether since 1952— fifty-six years—and the mayor of San Fran cisco him self per formed the cer e mony. I spent a lot of time cry ing that day too, not be cause I felt a fur ther shift in civil rights ...
5. Dealing with the Legal Business, Take Two
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Take a look at this link,” said the email from my friend Sarah. “It’s a re al ity show look ing for straight women and their “Are you and your friend the real Will & Grace?!” read the web site to which the link took me (I quote it ver ba tim). “Are you a gay guy liv ing with your straight best girl friend? Are you a straight girl whose best friend hap pens to be gay? Do you fin ish ...
6. Planning the Ceremony
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We need to have a con ver sa tion about plan ning the cer e mony,” I said to Mike one Sat ur day after noon about a month “You keep say ing that,” he said, “but then you never ac tu ally start a con ver sa tion about plan ning the cer e mony.” This was not an an i mad ver sion I could duck, be cause it was true; I never ac tu ally “But that’s be cause be fore now we haven’t had enough books ...
7. Taking Stock of the Relationship
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So,” said Dr. Base scu dur ing our first meet ing, “what brought you two in to see me today?”“Well, the short ver sion,” I said, “is that I made Mike go on a re al ity show and now he’s deeply re sent ful but we’re get ting mar ried in two months and we’ve wanted to do cou ples ther apy for a while any way and his in di vid ual ther a pist said you were ter rific ...
8. Taking Care of Last-Minute Details
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One month from today, I am get ting mar ried to my boy friend of seven years. I sus pect I would feel much more ner vous than I do if it weren’t for the fact that all my en ergy is taken up by the HGTV Urban Oasis Give away, which is in the grand scheme of things at pop u lated largely by peo ple from the Car ib bean, the down side of ...
9. Getting Married
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I don’t know whether Ra chel has read Wal ter Kauf mann, whose thoughts on rit ual helped me under stand what I wanted out of a wed ding cer e mony, and wants us to hear “the voice that the rest of the time one is prone to for get,” but I’m amazed at her abil ity to be si lent. Mike and I, hav ing cir cled each other seven times (it ...
10. Living Happily Ever After
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The party af ter ward was lovely. The sixty-odd wed ding guests—some of them had taken it upon them selves to bring “plus one”s, and I could not find it in my heart to be grudge them—de light edly among them, Sasha play ing the grace ful ém i nence grise Given the un speak ably early hour, the ca terer wasn’t fin ished pre par ing when we got back home, so peo ple just min gled and ...
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It’s Oc to ber of 2012, and as Mike and I are now com ing up on our two-year an ni ver sary it seemed ap pro pri ate to tie up a I stayed up all night the night be fore the wed ding writ ing entry cards and ad dress ing en ve lopes and filled up both our neigh bor-hood mail boxes so com pletely on the way to the air port that there was no room left in them and I had to send like five hun dred of ...
Appendix: A Brief and Highly Biased Legislative History of American Marriage Equality with Respect to Sexuality
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My first thanks, as usual, must go to Joy Tu tela, still the sex i est agent in Amer ica, David Black, still the second-sexiest agent in Amer ica, Ra phael Kad u shin, the sex i est ed i tor in Amer ica, and Mat thew Cosby, Sa ryta Rod ri guez, and Luke Thomas, the sex i est the idea in the first place, much less ex e cute it in any thing like an ...
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Gay American Auto biog ra phy: Writ ings from Whit man to Sed arisJust Mar ried: Gay Mar riage and the Ex pan sion of Human RightsThe Last De ploy ment: How a Gay, Hammer-Swinging Twen ty so meth ing ...
Page Count: 247
Publication Year: 2013
Series Title: Living Out: Gay and Lesbian Autobiog